Falling for My Ex's Friend - Chapter 14

As soon as the words left my mouth, I saw my new boyfriend standing in front of the café’s glass window, waving at me with a cheerful smile.

I scanned the QR code on the table to pay the bill and got up to leave.

I met my new boyfriend at a bar-a father who gambles excessively, a sick mother, and a broken man.

It’s wonderful; I’ve reached the age where I enjoy rescuing the fallen, and fortunately, I now have the means to do so.

When my friends learned about my new relationship, their reactions varied.

Some celebrated my new beginning, while others questioned my judgment in choosing someone like him.

But honestly, I just felt a connection with my new boyfriend, and I genuinely wanted to try dating a younger man to see if it could rekindle the dormant feelings of love within me.

The atmosphere throughout the date was pleasant, except for the constant buzzing of my phone, which was a bit distracting. Eventually, I just put it on silent.

At ten in the evening, my boyfriend drove me home. As I got out of the car, he lingered, insisting on coming up to my place.

I couldn’t resist the allure of his eight-pack abs and nodded in agreement.

Hand in hand, we stepped out of the elevator, and there was John, leaning against my apartment door.

The hallway was pitch black, and John’s face was cast in an eerie light from his glowing phone screen.

He kept dialing over and over, but all he heard was the monotonous “Sorry, the number you have dialed is currently on another call.”

Yet he was patient, dialing, hanging up. Dialing, hanging up.

Repeating the process tirelessly.

At times like this, I felt Ella was a bit of a blabbermouth. She had just met my boyfriend and immediately spilled the news to John.

Did she really think that as long as I had someone new, John would return to her?

Hearing the commotion, John finally turned his head and saw me.

His expression was calm.

He looked at me, then at the man beside me.

Then he asked, “Who is he?”

My new boyfriend, being young, was a bit intimidated by John’s aura and couldn’t help but tense up.

I patted my boyfriend’s back, gently soothing him, and pressed the elevator button for him to go home and rest early.

My boyfriend hesitated, glancing at John, a bit uneasy.

“Just catching up with an ex, no big deal, you know.”

It’s just the clichéd drama of a lovesick man and a resentful woman.

John is inherently someone who believes the world revolves around him. Before he completely gives up on me, it’s inevitable that he’ll come looking for me once, twice, or thrice.

As the elevator doors closed, I saw the smile on my face fade away.

John’s hand, hanging by his side, clenched and unclenched, and after a long while, he forced a smile. “You really didn’t need to break up with me. I honestly don’t mind you seeking something new.

“Was that guy from the bar? Is he clean? I actually have some connections I can introduce you to, so you can enjoy yourself with peace of mind.”

“Do you have enough money? I can transfer some to you, so you can have fun without worries.”

I listened quietly to his rambling, reaching into my bag for a cigarette and lighting it.

The swirling smoke momentarily blurred my vision as I stared at John without speaking.

His smile grew more strained, and finally, he could no longer maintain it.

“Don’t break up, okay?” His voice was very low, almost as if it would disappear into the dust, “As long as we don’t break up, I’ll support you no matter what you do.”

“John, when did you switch to the pimping business?” I asked him, “Is that how you see me?”

“Zoe, I genuinely wish you were that kind of woman. At least then, I’d have a way to keep you.

“Ten years, we’ve been together for ten whole years.”

John spoke, his voice finally choking.

From a distance that was neither near nor far, he looked at me, filled with despair and unwillingness: “Why is it that when you say you don’t love me, you just don’t?”

It was the first time I saw John cry.

His life had been so smooth, there was really nothing worth crying over.

“John, it’s not that I just stopped loving you. You know my nature; I’m a cautious person. Whether I love or not, it takes me a long time to be sure.”

“I wasn’t deeply in love with you at first. We got together on a whim, and I never intended to cling to you.”

“It was you who kept coming back to me, making me feel, time and again, that you were my anchor.”

“My love for you grew from shallow to deep. The year I loved you the most, I could do anything for you.”

“But you never accepted my deep love. You knew how much I couldn’t live without you, yet every time I was most immersed, someone new would appear by your side, reminding me to stay clear-headed.”

“You made me feel that my sincere feelings were truly cheap and insignificant.”

I walked up to him, reaching out to catch his falling tears.

A smile of relief on my face.

“See, you’re so upset now, but I don’t feel any pain at all. I really don’t love you anymore, not even a little bit.”

“John, we can’t go back. Even if it’s a forced harmony, I can’t maintain it any longer.”

John’s voice trembled, “Do you hate me?”

“No,” I shook my head, “I don’t hate you anymore.”

“After all this time apart, was there ever a moment, even just a second, where the thought of getting back together with me crossed your mind?”

I looked at him, answering firmly, “No.”

Not once.

That night, in the early hours, I was awakened by a call from an unknown number.

Answering it, the noise on the other end was loud. Holding the phone, I realized who it was.

I had blocked John’s number, so he probably used a friend’s phone to call me.

Neither of us spoke, and just before I hung up, John finally spoke, “I suddenly remembered there’s something I never told you.”

“Zoe, I love you.”

“I don’t know when it started.”

“Saying it now is too late. But I feel I owe you an explanation.”

Tears unexpectedly welled up, large and unstoppable.

In the darkness, I tried hard to keep my eyes wide open, staring at the ceiling, and before a sob could escape, I hung up the phone first.

It wasn’t because I was moved, or reluctant, or still had lingering feelings.

I was just very sad.

Sad for all the grievances I had endured over the years.

Sad for the belated realization that I had waited so long for those words.

I had quietly waited for a blossom of youth in the years gone by.

Now, the flower had finally bloomed.

But my heart had long since closed.

It’s truly a pity that in the end, we still missed each other.