Chapter 169

Chapter 169

“Who is Xie Tianqi?” In just a moment, Yao Qin seemed to become a completely different person again.

She no longer knew anyone named Xie Tianqi, nor anyone called Little Ah Yan.

Even the stuffed toy she had been holding in her arms was casually tossed aside.

Liu Shubai’s mood shifted along with Yao Qin’s, as if the tacit understanding they had built from years of spending every day and night together had long since become instinct. He smiled and explained, “No one. You don’t know him. Are you hungry? We have guests at home today. Help me entertain them, will you?”

Yao Qin studied Xie Qiyan and Xia Wanzhi for a while, then took two steps forward and smiled at them. “Since you’re guests, please have a seat. Don’t just stand there.”

Her face was full of smiles, her mood calm and gentle, as if everything that had just happened had been nothing more than an illusion.

Xie Qiyan closed his eyes. After taking a deep breath, he led Xia Wanzhi over and sat down.

He wanted to try saying something to Yao Qin, but when the words reached his lips and he tried to make a sound, the fine, threadlike pain in his heart tugged all the way up to his throat. Even breathing hurt, let alone speaking.

What could he say?

How was he supposed to say it?

In the end, it was Xia Wanzhi who began talking with Yao Qin.

As if they shared an unspoken understanding, she seemed to know exactly what Xie Qiyan wanted to ask. Almost every topic she brought up was steered toward the things he cared about.

Yao Qin answered smoothly, smiling as warmly as a spring breeze. In the middle of it, she even urged Liu Shubai, “Go tell the kitchen to prepare the meal. What are you standing here for?”

Liu Shubai went out as if going through the motions. Three minutes later, he returned and sat down to join the conversation.

Yao Qin was poised and gracious. “How come I’ve never heard you mention having friends this young before?”

She was asking Liu Shubai, but before he could answer, she turned to Xia Wanzhi and asked, “The two of you are a couple, aren’t you?”

Xia Wanzhi only smiled without speaking. She tilted her head and looked at Xie Qiyan, signaling for him to take over.

From the moment he sat down, Xie Qiyan had been looking at Yao Qin. His gaze was filled with sorrowful nostalgia, as though he were looking at a stranger he knew by heart, yet his entire being also radiated the joy of something lost and found again.

Yao Qin actually sensed that contradiction.

But the Yao Qin of this moment had shifted into some unknown personality. She was composed and gentle, yet she alone had forgotten everything about Xie Qiyan.

At last, Xie Qiyan came back to himself. He parted his lips and answered Yao Qin’s question. “We’re husband and wife. Wanzi is my wife.”

This was his first conversation with his mother after more than twenty years apart.

Yao Qin smiled happily and nodded in approval. “Good lad. You’re a lucky one.”

A smile appeared at the corners of Xie Qiyan’s mouth.

He thought that Yao Qin, at this moment, must have returned to a time before she ever met Xie Tianqi.

That crisp Jiangnan accent and that lovely glint in her eyes perfectly revealed the pure, kind, lively spirit she once had.

If she could stay like this forever, that would be fine too, Xie Qiyan thought.

After the meal, Yao Qin grew tired and went to rest. Only then did the heart Liu Shubai had been holding in his throat finally settle. He led Xie Qiyan and Xia Wanzhi to a small bamboo courtyard in the back garden, where they sat around a brazier and drank tea.

The instant he stepped inside, Xie Qiyan felt as though he had returned to his childhood, to that little Jiangnan courtyard where his father, his mother, and his great-grandmother had all been.

No, not as though.

This place had been restored by Liu Shubai to look almost exactly like that little courtyard.

Xie Qiyan instinctively looked at Liu Shubai.

Liu Shubai said nothing. After sitting down, he quietly brewed the tea.

“You saw it too. Your mother… she’s been like this for a very long time.” Liu Shubai met Xie Qiyan’s eyes before explaining, “It wasn’t that I insisted on cutting off contact between you and your mother. It’s that anyone from the Xie Family would have a devastating effect on her. Ayan, I only wanted to take her and run. To flee to any place where there were no members of the Xie Family, then hide her away and live out our days in peace.”

It was for Yao Qin’s sake, and also for his own selfish desires.

Sitting in this courtyard that was almost identical to the one from his childhood, Xie Qiyan turned his gaze toward the clusters of flowers. The wind that blew toward them was cold, stirring tiny sparks from the brazier and lifting a trace of warmth into the air.

After a long while, Xie Qiyan spoke softly. “Thank you.”

Liu Shubai’s hand, which was holding a cup, paused. He looked at him in disbelief.

“That time at Yangliu Lane, and the time she fell into the river.” Xie Qiyan’s voice was low. No emotion showed on his face, but his words carried sincere gratitude. “Thank you for staying by her side all these years.”

No matter why Liu Shubai had taken Yao Qin away, at least he had protected her.

Xie Qiyan was not someone who could not distinguish right from wrong.

As for favors and grudges, how could they ever be completely separated?

He did resent Liu Shubai for keeping mother and son apart for twenty years. But without him, Yao Qin might not have lived until now.

After a long silence, Liu Shubai smiled, a smile full of age and desolation. “I thought you would hate me.”

Yao Qin only had dissociative identity disorder. Sometimes her mind was muddled, but there were also times when she was lucid.

When she was lucid, she would miss her son. She would want to break free from the gilded cage he had built for her and go back to see her son. At those times, he was always the one who stopped her.

Aside from fearing that Yao Qin’s emotions would spiral out of control, he was also afraid that Yao Qin would leave him.

Xie Qiyan said nothing.

“She doesn’t love me. Whether she’s lucid or like she was just now, when she doesn’t remember anything, she doesn’t love me. She listens to me and goes along with me only because she sees me as a good friend, a friend she can rely on.” A trace of loneliness surfaced in Liu Shubai’s eyes. “Maybe she doesn’t love Xie Tianqi anymore either, but she can’t accept it. She can’t accept that she gave her feelings to the wrong person, and even more, she refuses to believe that all the vows she made with Xie Tianqi ultimately became a joke.”

“Ayan, she did think about going to see you. But after she packed her luggage, she lost her courage.” Liu Shubai’s eyes reddened. “Don’t blame her. She was only afraid you would see her in such an unbearable state, and even more afraid that you would resent her for abandoning you.”

She had her own suffering.

She was simply ill. Gravely ill.

Xie Qiyan lowered his eyes, hiding his emotions. He fell silent, not knowing what to say.

“As long as she’s safe,” he said.

As long as she was alive.

Everything else could be dealt with slowly.