Chapter 2

For the first nineteen years of my life, I’d thought those numbers couldn’t change.

I’d been able to see them above people’s heads for as long as I could remember.

When I was little, I hadn’t understood what they meant. Gradually, I’d worked it out: they showed how many times I had left to see each person.

Dad could stay with me until I was eighty-eight. Mom, until eighty-nine.

And Ji Chenfeng, the pretty boy next door, could stay until we were old.

His number was so very long. Longer than those of everyone else I’d ever met put together.

When I was five, I asked him, “Ji Chenfeng, what does being together for 31,441 days mean?”

He scratched his head, ran home to ask his mom, and came back with a smug little smile.

“It means we’ll be together for a really long time. We’ll get married.”

“Can two boys get married?”

I was surprised. Ji Chenfeng blinked, looking terribly grown-up.

“Of course.”

So I started raising him to be my husband. I taught him my version of the Three Obediences and Four Virtues for men and watched his every move.

He indulged me, but no matter what I said, he never agreed to date me.

“If I actually went out with you, I’d be a henpecked husband.”

At eighteen, he’d poked my forehead and laughed and laughed.

“Wait until I’m twenty-five, little boss. I’m not done having fun yet.”

He chose a different major from mine. He even had his dorm assignment changed so we wouldn’t share a room.

I waited and waited, thinking that once Ji Chenfeng turned twenty-five, we’d be together forever.

Instead, in barely a year of college, he’d grown increasingly impatient with me.

I sighed. I couldn’t say I was devastated. It was more a sense of regret.

If I’d known the number could change, I wouldn’t have been so strict with him. All those years of effort. Exhausting.

The sky was gloomy. The rain wasn’t heavy, but the air felt oppressive.

I hated rainy days. I quickened my pace, then stopped short at the sight of a boy up ahead.

He was tall and lean, dressed in black casual clothes. Even from behind, I could tell he was handsome.

But what caught my attention was the number above his head.

26,290.

The long string of digits that had hovered above Ji Chenfeng only yesterday now flickered over this boy.

Without thinking, I walked faster. The closer I got, the louder my footsteps splashed through the water, and the faster my heart beat.

By the time I’d almost reached him, I opened my mouth and found I had no idea what to say.

*Hey, handsome. Are you my future husband?*

*Hi. Do I look like your future wife?*

*Would you believe me if I said we’re going to be together?*

Every option made me sound like I’d escaped from a psychiatric ward.

While I agonized over it, I followed him like a creep, eyes fixed on the number above his head.

Then he stopped and slowly turned around. My eyes widened.

Rain drummed against our umbrellas, as loud as the fireworks going off inside my head.

It was as though another line had appeared after his number:

*THAT’S MY MAN.*

The photo Ji Chenfeng had shown me hadn’t done him justice. In person, the boy was almost unfairly beautiful.

His skin was cool and pale, making his lips look soft and pink. Very kissable.

Beneath sharply defined brows, beautiful amber eyes regarded me quietly.

Even the long, pale fingers curled around his umbrella handle looked like they belonged to a ball-jointed doll.

My face grew hotter and hotter. I couldn’t get a sentence out.

“Can I help you?”

Even his voice was lovely. His gaze was calm as still water.

“Are you scared to walk home by yourself?”

The second I heard myself, I nearly blacked out. What was I saying?

His mouth seemed to twitch, but he didn’t answer.

“I mean, I think we’re going the same way. Want to walk together…?”

My voice dwindled. I was so embarrassed I could barely go on. The butterflies in my stomach had apparently died of frustration at my inability to speak.

“Sure.”

That pleasant voice sounded beside me. The butterflies revived.

I spent the walk desperately searching for things to talk about.

Lin Jinran was exactly as Ji Chenfeng had described: reserved, a boy of few words.

I’d never known the sun could come out on a rainy day. Even the rain ahead looked like a rainbow. When I saw the gate to my residential complex just in front of us, I felt cheated.

We’d walked too fast. There was so much I hadn’t said.

“Lin Jinran. That’s my name.”

As I stepped through the gate, he stayed outside beneath his umbrella.

“I know.”

Ji Chenfeng had told me when he’d offered to introduce us. Lin Jinran raised his eyebrows slightly, looking surprised.

“Ruan Heyan.”

I pressed my lips together, about to explain which characters made up my name, but he nodded.

“I know, too.”

I took out my phone. My hand was shaking a little. I’d never tried to pick someone up before. All I could do was stare at his number and encourage myself.

*Don’t panic. He won’t turn you down. He’s your future husband.*

*Go, Ruan Heyan!*

“Could… could we exchange contact details?”

I finally forced it out, nearly biting my tongue.

Silence. Those few seconds he spent saying nothing made me want to die on the spot.

“Sorry. I didn’t bring my phone. Maybe I could—”

Such an obvious brush-off. I nearly choked, then turned and fled in mortification.

“That’s okay! Sorry to bother you…”

Even after I’d bolted inside the complex, my heart was pounding. My nose stung.

How humiliating.

He must think I was a complete weirdo.

I didn’t know why his rejection hurt so much more than anything Ji Chenfeng had said to me.

“Heyan.”

I’d just reached home and folded my umbrella when Ji Chenfeng called from behind me.

I turned, surprised to see him.

He came up in a few quick strides. Someone else’s perfume clung to him, stronger now that he was close.

“I thought I saw you at the intersection. Did you walk back with someone?”

He was breathing hard. Apparently, he’d run home, too.

“It looked like a boy. Do I know him? You—”

Before he could ask anything else, Mom came out of the kitchen carrying a plate.

“You’re back? Oh, Chenfeng, have you started seeing someone?”

He looked blank.

“Huh?”

Mom gave him a knowing wink.

“Your neck’s all red.”

Silence fell. Ji Chenfeng went paler and paler. He scrubbed at his face, panic flashing in his eyes.

“It rubbed off on me by accident. Heyan, I didn’t.”

I was still miserable about being rejected and couldn’t be bothered with him.

When he saw me leaving, he grew visibly anxious.

“I haven’t done anything with anyone. I remember all the rules. He nearly fell, and I caught him. Maybe that was when—”

He broke off. The panic faded, replaced by a hint of delight.

“I won’t walk with him again. Don’t cry.”

I wasn’t crying. I was just upset at the thought that next time I saw Lin Jinran, those beautiful eyes might look at me with disgust.

That was why my eyes were still a little red.

“What you do has nothing to do with me. I told you I’d stay out of your business. Leave me alone.”

My head already hurt. Having him grab me and chatter away made it worse.

Ji Chenfeng’s smile dimmed, but he pursed his lips.

“Keep pretending you don’t care.”

My dejection lasted until the next morning. Yawning, I headed toward the gate of the complex.

Then I saw who was standing outside, and my eyes widened.

I rubbed them. He was still there. Not a dream.

Lin Jinran seemed to spot me, too. He pulled his hands out of his pockets and slowly came toward me.

“I brought my phone… today.”

The tips of his ears were scarlet. He took out his phone and held up his QR code.

“Can we still add each other?”

My heart thudded louder with every beat. I could barely get the words out.

“You came here this early just to add me?”

Lin Jinran pressed his lips together. His ears looked red enough to bleed.

“I didn’t know which building you lived in.”

Adorable.

My health bar was almost empty.

Grinning, I whipped out my phone and scanned his code. A tiny version of me was dancing wildly inside my head.

“It’s Saturday. What if I hadn’t come out?”

Now that I knew the attraction wasn’t one-sided, I was getting bold.

“I don’t know.”

He put his phone away and watched me quietly.

“Have you had breakfast?” I asked, tilting my head.

He opened his mouth. I noticed the dew on the hair over his forehead and couldn’t suppress my smile.

“Looks like you haven’t. Here’s your chance, then. Buy me breakfast.”

He nodded, and I happily pulled him toward a breakfast shop.

Lin Jinran didn’t hate me. In fact, he liked me quite a lot!

I hadn’t expected to run into someone we knew over breakfast, though.

Zhang Ming swept a disdainful glance over my face.

“Ji Chenfeng isn’t coming. I asked him out this morning, and he wouldn’t budge. His little shadow certainly keeps well informed.”

It took me a moment to catch up. I looked at him in silence.

“Ruan Heyan, could you stop clinging to him? He almost accepted my confession yesterday. In the end, he only turned me down because he said you’d be upset. You’re not even dating. Why do you get a say in everything?”

Looking at this pretty boy bristling with hostility, I belatedly realized he was coming after me because of Ji Chenfeng.

“I’ve already cleared things up with Ji Chenfeng. You don’t need to tell me about the two of you.”

With my destined match right behind me, I wanted to cut every possible tie with Ji Chenfeng immediately.

Zhang Ming looked skeptical.

“You mean that?”

I nodded.

“Wishing you and Ji Chenfeng a long, happy life together.”

He pursed his lips and took out his phone.

“Say that again. I’ll send it to him…”

I stared at him, at a loss. Oh my God. How terrifying. Truly.

A hand closed around my wrist. Lin Jinran’s eyes had gone cold.

“He doesn’t owe you an explanation.”

His fingertips were cool, but my wrist felt scorching beneath them. As he led me out of the breakfast shop, I clearly saw Zhang Ming lift his phone and photograph our backs.

“Are you a little upset…?”

I nibbled my steamed bun and stole a look at Lin Jinran.

He ate quietly. Somehow, he made eating a meat bun look aristocratic.

“They said you’ve liked Ji Chenfeng for years.”

His voice was rough. His Adam’s apple shifted.

“Ruan Heyan, Ji Chenfeng says bad things about you in our dorm. I think… he isn’t good to you.”

So while I’d fallen at first sight, someone else had already been thinking about me.

The tiny version of me grew even more smug. I sneaked a grin at the long number over his head.

My laughter flustered him. Ears red, he stopped talking.

I leaned closer and poked his cheek, puffed out around a mouthful of bun.

“If he’s so bad, what do you think about me liking someone else?”

He turned toward me. His eyes flickered, and the flush spread from his ears to his cheeks.

“Can you just… change who you like?”

I put on my most serious face and led him on.

“Sure. As long as that person treats me well enough.”

Lin Jinran went quiet again, lowering his head to eat. I had no idea what he was thinking.

When I got home, someone was sitting in the living room. Assuming it was Dad, I headed straight for my bedroom, only to have my arm seized.

I jumped. It was Ji Chenfeng.

His face was dark, his eyes darker, as though he were holding back a tremendous fury.

“Where were you?”

I tried to pull away and frowned at him.

“Getting breakfast.”

“Where’s mine?”

Silence. Only then did I remember that whenever I bought breakfast, I always brought a portion to Ji Chenfeng first. Today, I’d come home empty-handed. I’d been too busy teasing that sweet, earnest Lin Jinran.

“Who’s this in the photo?”

“Who did you get breakfast with?”

He pulled out his phone and opened the picture Zhang Ming had sent him. There we were, Lin Jinran and me, seen from behind.

A vein throbbed at Ji Chenfeng’s temple. He seemed to force the words through his teeth.

“Do I know him?”

“You make me memorize your rules and stay pure for you. What about you?”

“Ruan Heyan, you fucking held someone else’s hand behind my back?”

I looked at him quietly. Ji Chenfeng was handsome, but something seemed to be missing.

As I studied his furious, reddened eyes, it finally came to me.

He was missing a mole beneath his eye. Before I met Lin Jinran, I’d never thought boys with moles there were especially good-looking.

Just as, before I met him, I’d thought Ji Chenfeng had a pretty nice temperament.

Now, he seemed awfully noisy.

He caught the flash of irritation in my eyes, and his expression worsened.

“I’m talking to you. Who are you thinking about?”

For a moment, I felt guilty.

He could tell?

“Answer me.”

I frowned, dodged the hand reaching to grip my chin, and stepped back.

“What’s it got to do with you?”

His mouth opened and closed. I kept looking at him coldly.

“Who are you to me? Why do you get a say?”

He’d said those very words to me only a few days earlier. Hearing them returned to him unchanged, he stopped breathing quite so hard.

“Heyan. Trying a new tactic?”

He rubbed his brow, apparently feeling much better.

“You’ve been getting more and more temperamental lately. Fine. I’ll let it go.”

Listening to him carry on this conversation with himself, I decided he talked too much and was far too full of himself.

Lin Jinran would never say anything so conceited.

My phone vibrated. My mood instantly improved.

“My parents are out this afternoon, too. What should we eat…?”

Ji Chenfeng rolled up his sleeves and headed for our kitchen as though he belonged there. I swiped at my screen. Before I could say anything, a boy called from outside.

“Ji Chenfeng, are you home?”

Zhang Ming.

I lazily lifted my eyes. Ji Chenfeng stopped, turning toward me in alarm.

Zhang Ming kept calling. I crossed to the window and leaned out.

He was standing outside Ji Chenfeng’s house, breakfast in his hands, looking expectant.

“I didn’t invite him…”

Ji Chenfeng’s voice shook. Frowning at me as though afraid I wouldn’t believe him, he took out his phone to show me their messages.

“Look, I turned him down. I don’t know why he came…”

I turned back to him. Beads of sweat had appeared along his temples.

“I have plans today. You don’t need to cook for me.”

Silence fell. His eyes were frighteningly dark.

“I’ve explained already. Do you still have to sulk?”

I had no words.

“Ji Chenfeng, you weren’t this bad at reading comprehension when we did it together in elementary school.”

“I’ve told you over and over. Your business has nothing to do with me. I won’t interfere with who you spend time with. Isn’t that what you’ve always wanted?”

His face set, his jaw clenched. He turned and walked out.

“Fine. Don’t regret it.”

From downstairs came Zhang Ming’s delighted voice, asking if Ji Chenfeng would go to the aquarium with him.

Before, I would absolutely have made a scene.

Ji Chenfeng was the husband I was raising for myself. I wanted a man who’d kept himself entirely for me. Even someone else touching him would have made me angry.

Now, listening to him deliberately raise his voice to accept Zhang Ming’s invitation, I smiled and picked up my phone to reply to Lin Jinran.

*Sounds good. See you at noon.*

Lin Jinran didn’t talk much. He barely even changed expression, but the light and laughter in his eyes were enough to captivate me.

For several days, I forgot Ji Chenfeng existed.

The next time I heard about him was the following Friday.

We’d almost never gone so many days without seeing each other. Even at college, on such a big campus, I’d still stuck to him every day to keep him in line.

“I think that really handsome guy in the finance class is dating Zhang Ming from our dorm. I saw them holding hands downstairs last time.”

“Doesn’t he have that clingy childhood friend? Didn’t they have a fight?”

“No idea. Haven’t seen him lately. Maybe they’re having a spat.”

I packed my things faster and pretended I hadn’t heard.

Lin Jinran had no classes that afternoon. We’d arranged to go to the amusement park.

Just thinking about seeing my adorable future husband again made it impossible to stop smiling.

The smile slowly slipped, though, when I spotted Ji Chenfeng.

He stood outside my classroom with his lips pressed together. His eyes brightened a little as I came out.

“Let’s go.”

I’d forgotten we went home together every Friday. My head began to ache.

He reached naturally for my backpack. I stepped back, and his brows slowly drew together.

“Still angry?”

I pursed my lips. Before I could speak, people walking past began sneaking glances at us and whispering to one another.

At the faint sound of Zhang Ming’s name, Ji Chenfeng’s expression stiffened.

Seeing my unhappy face, he frowned.

“Have you been avoiding me because you’ve heard some nonsense?”

I shook my head, then nodded.

I wasn’t avoiding him. I was simply too busy falling in love to spare him any attention.

But I had heard the rumors.

“Don’t listen to them. We’re just in the same club. We can’t avoid each other completely. You can’t expect to control even—”

I nudged the ground with my toe. The afternoon sun was glaring.

I’d asked Lin Jinran to wait by the school gate. Would he get too much sun out there?

“I was wrong. All right?”

When I didn’t respond, Ji Chenfeng took a breath, his eyes full of resignation.

“I’ll clear up those rumors as soon as possible. I’m still your untouched little future hus—”

Zhang Ming interrupted him, rushing over in delight.

“Ji Chenfeng! Didn’t you say you had no time for me this afternoon?”

Ji Chenfeng’s face changed. Before he could explain, I took off running.

Sunlight fell across the boy waiting quietly at the gate. He wore nothing more elaborate than a white shirt, and the sight of him still filled me with happiness.

The long number above his head made my steps lighter still.

“It’s so sunny. Why didn’t you wait in the shade?”

As I ran up, Lin Jinran’s dark eyes brightened. He took my backpack, a smile warming his voice.

“I wanted to stand somewhere you’d see me right away.”

The answer slipped out before I could think.

“I’d see you right away wherever you stood.”

Even the midsummer cicadas couldn’t drown out the pounding heartbeat. I couldn’t tell whether it was his or mine. I only knew I felt unbearably hot.

Lin Jinran had never been to an amusement park. I dragged him from ride to ride, and he followed quietly, his eyes full of stars.

“Lin Jinran, is there a girl you like?”

I handed him an ice cream, asking with spectacularly unconvincing casualness.

He looked at me for two seconds, then lowered his head, scooped the cherry off his ice cream into my bowl, and shook his head.

I tried again.

“What about a boy?”

His ears turned completely red.

“There wasn’t before.”

Grinning, I refused to let it go.

“Before when?”

He opened his mouth. His voice was so soft I could barely hear it.

“Before I met you.”

Oh, my future husband was cute.

I couldn’t help laughing. He looked a little annoyed at being teased, but his ears were scarlet.

“Are you telling me you like me?”

I popped the cherry into my mouth. It was meltingly sweet.

Beside me, he thought about it seriously for a few seconds.

“No.”

I turned to him in surprise.

“Lin Jinran, are you a player?”

He froze, looking utterly lost. I’d never seen that expression on his face before, and it only made me want to tease him more.

“You say you like me, but you won’t ask me out. How is that any different from Ji Chenfeng?”

His gaze flickered at Ji Chenfeng’s name. I cleared my throat, realizing that had been a terrible thing to bring up.

I was about to say something when he pressed his lips together and stood.

“Wait here a moment.”

Watching him hurry away, I didn’t know what to do.

Comparing him to Ji Chenfeng really had been hurtful. I reached instinctively to stop him, but a surprised cry sounded nearby.

I turned and saw two familiar figures.

They were on the water slide. Zhang Ming’s clothes had gotten a little wet, and he was nestled blissfully in the other boy’s arms.

Ji Chenfeng was frowning, his thoughts elsewhere. But he hadn’t pushed Zhang Ming away. Instead, he’d sheltered him beneath his jacket.

They looked so much like a couple in the throes of new love that people around them started teasing them.

Just my luck.

Why did I have to run into them everywhere? My already poor mood worsened. I was about to leave when Ji Chenfeng’s eyes met mine.

The instant he recognized me, he pushed the boy in his arms away.

Caught unprepared, with nothing to shelter him, Zhang Ming got thoroughly splashed.

“Ji Chenfeng…?”

He looked up, confused, only to see Ji Chenfeng running off in a panic.

I wanted to leave, but Lin Jinran had told me to wait here. I stayed. A moment later, Ji Chenfeng arrived in front of me, panting.

“Heyan, it isn’t what it looks like.”

He spoke so fast he almost stammered.

“He said he’d bought two tickets and had never been here, so I thought I’d come with him just this once. There’s nothing between us. Just now—”

I watched him calmly. His words gradually dried up.

He stood there breathing hard, trying to get some reaction from me.

When he saw the indifference in my eyes, he looked incredulous.

“Ruan Heyan. I’m on a date with another boy.”

I touched my nose and muttered, “So am I. What’s there to brag about?”

He hadn’t heard. Irritation crept into his voice.

“You’re not angry?”

I sighed.

“I’ve told you. What you do has nothing to do with me. If you’re on a date, pay attention to your date. Look how wet he got…”

Zhang Ming looked furious. Shaking water from his hair, he caught up and hooked his arm through Ji Chenfeng’s, shooting me a challenging look.

“Ruan Heyan, could you stop following Ji Chenfeng around? He’s sick to death of—”

Ji Chenfeng yanked his arm away, his expression frighteningly dark.

“What’s it got to do with you? Who are you to talk about him like that?”

Wow.

A matched pair of lunatics.

I stared at them, speechless, when a lovely voice sounded behind me.

“He wasn’t following you. Heyan came here with me.”

I turned. Lin Jinran was standing there with a bouquet.

My bad mood vanished. I thought I understood now.

His lips were pressed together, his beautiful brows faintly drawn. Tiny beads of sweat dotted his forehead.

Ji Chenfeng looked disbelieving.

“You two…?”

I ran to Lin Jinran and took the flowers, tilting my head as I smiled up at him.

“Are these for me?”

He looked away from the others. His throat moved, and color crept across his face.

“Yes.”

“RUAN HEYAN!”

Ji Chenfeng roared behind me. How uncivilized. Shouting and making a scene in public.

Nothing like Lin Jinran, who was quiet and ridiculously handsome.

Only after meeting him had I realized that a good man didn’t need to be trained from childhood. He could keep himself in line perfectly well.

Lin Jinran was even better-looking than Ji Chenfeng. Why didn’t he have a Zhang Ming—or any other Ming—hanging around him?

Ji Chenfeng couldn’t control himself, yet here he was, yelling his head off.

I rolled my eyes and took Lin Jinran’s hand to leave.

“Ruan Heyan, just try walking away!”

Threats, too. Lin Jinran would never.

Hearing footsteps pursuing us, I held the bouquet in one hand, gripped Lin Jinran with the other, and ran.

The wind carried the scent of flowers. Our palms grew damp and warm where they met, one of us too nervous to stop sweating. The noise around us faded. All I could feel was my heart about to take flight and the smile pulling at my mouth.

When I could no longer hear Ji Chenfeng, I knew Zhang Ming had held him up.

I turned toward Lin Jinran’s shining eyes.

“I’m not like him.”

“Lin Jinran, did that feel like eloping?”

We spoke at the same time, then both froze.

Once I realized what he’d said, I burst out laughing. His ears reddened at my laughter. He struggled for ages before finding his voice.

“It did.”

“Ruan Heyan, I don’t want to be like Ji Chenfeng.”

“I looked up how to do this. They said asking someone out should be a proper occasion. You should make sure they like you back, and you should have flowers.”

“I hadn’t planned to ask you today. They don’t sell flowers inside the park, so I went out to buy some.”

He continued softly.

“Maybe this still isn’t much of an occasion. But I don’t want you to think I’m like him.”

“Ruan Heyan, I like you. Could you like me a little, too?”

When I only stared, he grew anxious and hurried on.

“I’ve memorized your rules, too. When Heyan goes out, follow him. When Heyan gives an order, obey him. When Heyan is wrong, agree with him anyway…”

I gaped.

“How do you know those?”

His face turned even redder.

“Ji Chenfeng complained about them in our dorm. I wrote them down when he wasn’t looking…”

The things Ji Chenfeng despised, Lin Jinran had secretly collected and memorized like a fool guarding treasure.

I couldn’t hold it in. I crouched down, laughing helplessly.

He stood beside me at a loss while I laughed until I nearly cried.

How was my future husband this adorable?

When I’d finally finished, I straightened and swung our joined hands.

“I don’t hold hands with people I don’t like.”

He stared for a moment. Then understanding dawned, and he couldn’t stop the corners of his mouth lifting.

“So we’re together?”

“No.”

Before meeting him, I’d never known I had such a wicked streak. As the light slowly faded from his eyes, I leaned closer.

“You’re not just my boyfriend. You’re my future husband, you know?”

Remembering the first moment I’d seen him, I beamed.

I’d clearly stunned him again. His pupils widened, and his ears flushed.

It took a long time before he found his voice, low and rough.

“I know now.”

Lin Jinran walked me home. At my door, I turned and saw a gloomy-faced Ji Chenfeng.

I’d known he’d come to ambush me.

I hugged my flowers and ignored him completely, but a hand clamped around my arm.

“What is this supposed to mean?”

He seemed furious. His voice was icy.

“I waited for you all afternoon. Where were you?”

Fiddling with the bouquet, I looked at him as though he’d lost his mind.

“On a date with my boyfriend. Can’t you tell?”

Pain shot through my arm. He was losing control of his strength as well as his temper, his chest heaving.

“Boyfriend? Lin Jinran?”

“If you’ve got a boyfriend, what am I?”

I wrenched free and stared at him in bafflement.

“Delusional? What relationship do we have?”

His face darkened alarmingly. He snatched the flowers from my hands.

“No relationship? You policed me for all those years for no reason? You called me your future husband for no reason? You said we’d be together forever for no reason?”

He flung the flowers onto the ground. My temper snapped, too. I slapped him.

“What gives you the right to interrogate me? Weren’t you the one who wanted to introduce him to me?”

“You told me to stop clinging to you and controlling you. You said you didn’t want to be with me. What the hell are you doing now?”

His lips trembled.

“So you got together with someone else just to make me angry?”

I gave him a disgusted look and bent to pick up the bouquet. Then I noticed Zhang Ming watching quietly a short distance away.

When he realized I’d seen him, he pressed his lips together, about to speak. Before he could, Ji Chenfeng tore the flowers out of my hands again.

“Ah!”

A boy’s shriek rang out. Ji Chenfeng had hurled the bouquet into Zhang Ming’s face, leaving red marks.

“Get lost! If you hadn’t kept hanging around me and bad-mouthing Heyan, he wouldn’t have started dating someone else out of spite!”

Zhang Ming ran away, eyes red.

Frowning, I put more distance between Ji Chenfeng and me.

Who knew he had a violent streak?

Lin Jinran didn’t.

“Break up with him. I’ll pretend this never happened. I won’t see Zhang Ming again, either. We’ll go back to how things were…”

I was so speechless I could almost see a line of dots hanging above my own head.

“So you’re not just the type to hit a partner. You dodge responsibility, too.”

His expression froze. I frowned in disgust.

“Do you think blaming everyone else hides what’s wrong with you?”

“Ji Chenfeng, you make me sick.”

He swayed. I turned and went inside without looking back.

*Did you have fun today?*

We’d only been apart a little while, and I already missed my boyfriend. Hopeless. I was completely love-brained.

He replied instantly.

*I had a wonderful time.*

*Did you, Heyan?*

Of course I had. My smile was embarrassingly besotted.

*A little. What are you doing?*

*Showering.*

One word, and I was giggling like an idiot. I started teasing him again.

*Replying even in the shower? You must really like me, Lin Jinran.*

*How far have you gotten? Let me see.*

This time, he went quiet for ages. I covered my mouth to stifle my laughter.

I could picture his flushed face perfectly. I was still grinning when a video call suddenly popped up.

My eyes widened. I nearly dropped my phone.

He actually dared…

After wavering for a few seconds, I answered, my face burning. On the other side of the screen, he’d already wrapped himself securely in a bath towel.

Seeing my scarlet face, he chuckled as he dried his hair. His eyes shone, droplets falling from his fringe.

Water slipped down his pale jaw, over his beautiful Adam’s apple, and into the towel draped around his shoulders.

His laughter made me bristle. I knew he was laughing because I talked a big game but couldn’t follow through.

“Why are you so covered up? Pull the towel down a little.”

His hand paused over his hair. His ears slowly reddened. I thought he’d pretend not to understand, but those elegant fingers really did begin lowering the towel.

I swallowed at the sight of his broad arms and collarbones.

“Lin Jinran. How generous of you.”

He coughed twice, as though he’d choked on my words.

“A little lower.”

He obediently tugged it down. The red spread from his ears to his neck; even the skin between his pectorals turned faintly pink.

“A little more.”

“Just one more tug.”

After a long while, a quiet sigh came through the screen. His upper body was pink with embarrassment, while his knuckles had whitened with restraint.

“Heyan. This is as far as it goes.”

I pursed my lips in disappointment.

“All right, then.”

“You’re so generous, Lin Jinran. Do you let just anyone look?”

The camera returned to his handsome face. He frowned a little.

“Only you. The rules say no one except Heyan is allowed to see—”

I nearly spat out my milk.

“Okay, don’t recite them. I know.”

He fell quiet. We gazed at each other across the screen.

He was so good-looking. And it wasn’t only his face. Even the way he looked at me seemed to shine…

Just as I was thinking that, a message alert sounded on his side. A second later, his eyes dimmed slightly.

I caught the change at once and leaned in to look more closely.

Definitely.

The corners of his mouth had dropped two pixels.

“Who messaged you?” I asked.

He looked surprised, but after a couple of seconds, he answered honestly.

“I don’t know him. An unfamiliar number.”

“He said his name was Zhang Ming.”

My heart sank. Lin Jinran frowned faintly.

“I’ve blocked him. The rules say I’m not allowed to pay attention to anyone except Heyan—”

My temple twitched. I cleared my throat.

“What did he say?”

I could already guess.

He was quiet for a few seconds. Then he pressed his lips together, the faintest hurt threading through his voice.

“He said he heard you say you were only with me to upset Ji Chenfeng. That you don’t really like me.”

My temper flared.

“Bullshit!”

I frowned at Lin Jinran on the screen and tried to explain.

“Don’t listen to him. I—”

He nodded.

“I know. You’re not that kind of person.”

The words caught in my throat. Looking at him, I sniffed.

“Then why are you unhappy?”

His throat moved. A long time passed before he spoke, his voice rough.

“I’m not unhappy. There’s just… a tight feeling in my chest.”

I fought to keep the corners of my mouth down.

He watched me through the screen, little lights flickering in his eyes.

“The amusement park we went to today. You went there with Ji Chenfeng before, too. He mentioned it in our dorm.”

“Heyan, am I being petty?”

I shook my head. Inside, I was floating.

“That’s called jealousy, Lin Jinran. Yes, I went to the amusement park with him. But from now on, I’ll only go with you. If I’ve been to a hundred places with him, I’ll go to a thousand with you.”

His eyes lit up again. He watched me quietly, almost entranced.

My face warmed under his gaze. Looking at the shine at the corners of his mouth, I remembered my very first thought on meeting him: those lips looked wonderfully kissable.

I cleared my throat.

“I never went on the Ferris wheel with Ji Chenfeng. You know the story about Ferris wheels, right? Neither of us has class tomorrow afternoon. Want to go together?”

Lin Jinran smiled and nodded.

I’d been happy all day. Then, at noon, I heard terrible news.

“Two guys from finance got into a fight. Roommates, apparently. One of them supposedly stole the other’s boyfriend. They’re both really handsome…”

My heart lurched. I ran toward the place they’d mentioned as though I’d lost my mind. Wind rushed past my ears, and sweat broke out along my back.

Ji Chenfeng had boxed since childhood. Lin Jinran was in good shape, but he was so pale and lean. What if Ji Chenfeng had beaten him—

The weight in my chest dropped away when I saw who was being restrained.

Lin Jinran had Ji Chenfeng pinned to the wall with one hand. Ji Chenfeng’s face was red with fury, and he was still swearing.

“You bitch! You homewrecker! I treated you like a brother, and you seduced Ruan Heyan? Why don’t you go die?”

“You knew he was mine! No wonder you hardly say two words all day, but the second his name comes up, you start defending him. You’ve wanted him all along, you scheming bastard!”

My mouth twitched. I walked over. At the sight of me, Ji Chenfeng’s eyes immediately reddened, as though he’d suffered some unbearable injustice.

“Heyan…”

I circled Lin Jinran, checking him over. Only after making sure he wasn’t hurt did I breathe again.

He, on the other hand, seemed nervous to see me, as though afraid I’d blame him. He let go and stood beside me, lips pressed together.

“He started calling me names…”

His voice was a little hoarse. Apparently, he wasn’t used to telling on people. Ji Chenfeng watched me pitifully, still panting.

“He’s really strong. Look, it’s red here.”

He stretched his neck toward me, coaxing.

“Heyan, he’s awful. He’s so good at pretending. Look, he’s even scraped my skin…”

Lin Jinran paled. His mouth opened, but nothing came out.

I frowned and pushed Ji Chenfeng away.

“If it hurts, go to the infirmary. Stop acting crazy.”

Silence. People around us sucked in a breath.

“Actually, maybe you should compensate my boyfriend for emotional distress. Snapping at everyone like a rabid dog—look how pale you’ve scared him.”

Ji Chenfeng stared at me in disbelief. I took Lin Jinran’s hand and turned to leave.

“And stop spreading lies. You and I never dated. Lin Jinran is my first boyfriend, not some homewrecker.”

“You’re the bitch who’s bullying my boyfriend.”

Even after we’d gone a long way, I could still hear the murmuring behind us.

Lin Jinran followed me, eyes bright, his steps light and happy. By the time we entered the amusement park, I couldn’t resist turning toward him.

“That happy?”

His lashes trembled. He gave a soft hum of agreement.

“You chose me in front of Ji Chenfeng. I’m very happy.”

I poked his arm.

“I’d choose you in front of anyone. So, Lin Jinran, you’re going to stay happy.”

He watched me quietly until my face reddened.

I’d heard the Ferris wheel was better at night, so I dragged him to the haunted house first.

“Lin Jinran, I’m so scared. Can I hold on to you in there?”

I asked softly, unable to hide my smile.

Sweet, innocent Lin Jinran nodded seriously.

“I’ll hold your hand. You won’t get lost.”

There was certainly no chance of that. He let me cling to him—and feel him up, too.

In the pitch-dark haunted house, his breathing grew heavier and heavier. My hands wandered over his upper body, and he let me do as I pleased without stopping me.

Just before we reached the exit, he caught my arm. Half hidden in shadow, his neck was scarlet and his eyes looked a little misty.

“Can we wait a moment before going out…?”

I glanced down, then crouched, shaking with laughter.

My future husband was too adorable. I couldn’t take it.

As the Ferris wheel reached its highest point, fireworks burst all around us. I looked at him in surprise.

“Did you arrange this?”

The fireworks and tiny stars weren’t the only things reflected in his eyes. I was there, too.

“Yes. Do you like it?”

I cupped his face and moved closer. His pupils widened as I leaned in and softly pressed my lips to his.

“I do. And not just the fireworks.”

“You, too.”

All I could think of was that first breathtaking glimpse of him.

His lips really were wonderful to kiss.

When he began running out of breath, I finally let him go and collapsed into his arms, laughing.

“Don’t you know how to breathe?”

He looked embarrassed.

“Sorry. I was too nervous…”

Feeling how stiffly he held himself made me laugh harder. Then I looked up and noticed something wrong.

“Why have we stopped up here? Did you arrange this, too?”

The fireworks were over. Only now did I realize we’d been suspended in the air far too long.

Apparently, Lin Jinran had only just noticed, too. He shook his head in surprise.

“No.”

We sat at the very top of the Ferris wheel, staring at each other. Fortunately, he didn’t panic. He even started comforting me.

“Don’t be scared. It’s probably just some old machinery getting stuck. Someone will fix it soon…”

The amusement park really was old, but I wasn’t scared at all.

With no one around, I wrapped myself around him and stole kiss after kiss. Only when someone finally helped us down did I realize the park was closing.

Naturally, we’d missed the dorm curfew, too.

I frowned and asked, “Did you bring your ID card?”

He looked startled, then shook his head. I sighed. Neither had I.

“Then we’ll be sleeping on the street…”

After a few quiet seconds, he spoke softly.

“I think I have an empty apartment near campus. I’ve never stayed there. We could make do for one night…”

My phone kept vibrating. I checked it. Ji Chenfeng.

I declined the call and blocked him. Then Lin Jinran’s phone started ringing.

“Ignore it.”

I took his phone from him. My eyes flickered.

“Lin Jinran. You’ve liked me for that long?”

Looking at the photograph, I was suddenly back six months earlier.

Ji Chenfeng had just joined the club then. He hadn’t yet become so resistant to me looking after him. Once, he’d fainted from low blood sugar while playing basketball, and I’d run into the gym to carry him on my back.

People had remarked that I was stronger than I looked. Then a tall boy had silently taken Ji Chenfeng from me and helped get him to the infirmary.

I remembered his handsome profile, but my whole mind had been on Ji Chenfeng. I hadn’t really noticed who he was.

He’d carried Ji Chenfeng, and I’d walked beside them. Someone had apparently taken a candid photo and posted it on the campus confession page, an online board for anonymous crushes. Later, it had been deleted.

That photo was Lin Jinran’s wallpaper.

Except he’d blurred out Ji Chenfeng on his back, leaving only the two of us.

Only now did I notice that his eyes had stayed on me the entire time, while mine had stayed on Ji Chenfeng.

My throat tightened, and my nose stung. When Lin Jinran saw my reddening eyes, he didn’t know what to do.

“If you don’t like it, I’ll change it right now. It’s the only picture I have with you. I saved it without asking how you’d feel. I’m sorry…”

I raised the phone, stood on tiptoe, and kissed his cheek, capturing that instant.

In the photo, his pupils were slightly widened, his eyes sparkling. He was impossibly beautiful.

“Use this one. There’s no one else in it.”

I changed his wallpaper, took his hand, and led him on.

Early the next morning, I propped myself up and climbed out of Lin Jinran’s arms.

Hmph. He was already my future husband, and he thought we were sleeping in separate rooms? Dream on.

I’d slipped into his bedroom in the middle of the night. And hadn’t he wrapped his arms around me in his sleep and held me tight?

I pinched his cheek, smugly admiring my boyfriend’s sleepy face.

I had excellent taste.

We’d barely entered campus when someone came rushing at us and grabbed my shoulders. Frowning, Lin Jinran instinctively pulled me against him to protect me. The force nearly knocked us off balance.

When I recognized Ji Chenfeng, eyes red and dark circles beneath them, I frowned in irritation.

“What’s wrong with you? Why are you charging at us like a wild boar?”

His eyes were alarmingly red. The bloodshot whites made it clear he hadn’t slept all night.

“Where did you go last night? Neither of you came back to the dorm?”

Remembering how he’d woken to find me sprawled in his arms, Lin Jinran’s ears reddened again. That blush visibly set Ji Chenfeng off.

He swore and lunged forward.

I stepped in front of Lin Jinran, frowning.

“What does where I go with my boyfriend have to do with you?”

Tears slowly filled Ji Chenfeng’s eyes, reddening their corners further.

“Ruan Heyan, you said I was your future husband. You said we’d be together forever.”

“You said you could see the number over my head, that we had so much time ahead of us. Now you’re with someone else just to spite me, treating me like this. Do you really think it doesn’t hurt?”

“I have feelings, too, Ruan Heyan. I know I was wrong. From now on, I’ll follow every one of your rules. I won’t use other boys to make you angry again. Look at my number. We’ve still got decades together. Please stop hurting me like this…”

Big tears rolled down his face. I almost never saw him cry.

Beside me, Lin Jinran paled. Clearly, Ji Chenfeng had also complained in their dorm about my claim that I could see how many meetings remained with other people.

Ji Chenfeng seemed to gain confidence. He stared straight at me.

“Let’s stop being angry. Let’s stop using other people to hurt each other. Ever since I found out you were dating someone else, I haven’t been able to sleep. Last night, when you wouldn’t answer, I nearly lost my mind. Heyan, I’ll listen to you from now on. We don’t have to wait until I’m twenty-five. Let’s be together now. Please…”

I looked at Lin Jinran, then at the sobbing Ji Chenfeng, and spoke softly.

“I thought you didn’t believe me.”

The corners of his eyes reddened further.

“I do. From now on, I’ll believe everything you say. I’ll do whatever you ask. Heyan, let’s make up…”

I pointed above his head, then above Lin Jinran’s.

“But, Ji Chenfeng…”

Under his hopeful gaze, I continued quietly.

“That long number isn’t over your head anymore. It moved to his the moment you showed me his photo.”

Everything went still. Remembering my strange behavior that day—and his own panicked heartbeat as he’d snatched back his phone—Ji Chenfeng went white as paper.

“That’s impossible. How could…”

I looked at the two remaining above his head, pressed my lips together, and said nothing more. Taking Lin Jinran’s hand, I walked away.

A light breeze blew. After weighing my words for a few minutes, I turned to explain.

“I don’t like you because of that number. It’s because…”

Then I saw how brightly his eyes were shining. He seemed to be floating inside a cloud of pink bubbles. His eyes were practically turning into hearts.

I had no words.

His gaze was so warm and happy that I couldn’t finish.

“Heyan, is the number above my head really, really long?”

I nodded.

His eyes slowly reddened at the corners.

“Heyan, I’m so happy.”

“When Ji Chenfeng told us about it in the dorm, he laughed and called you a liar. He said you only made it up so you could keep clinging to him. But I believed you.”

“I didn’t think you’d lie. I thought you really would be together for a very, very long time. That’s why I didn’t even dare get to know you or tell you my name.”

“But now I’m the one who gets to see you again and again. I’m so happy.”

My eyes burned.

Lin Jinran had such a handsome face and such a silly head. He believed everything I said.

Thank goodness he did.

In the end, Ji Chenfeng really did move away. He said he’d come back, and his eyes were swollen from crying when he left, but there was nothing he could do.

His father had been arrested for embezzlement and taking bribes. He and his mother could only hide abroad.

On the day he left, he asked me, “What’s the number above my head now? We’ll see each other again, won’t we? Heyan…”

The light in his eyes was shattered, stubborn and desperate.

“I’ll work hard and earn money. Once I’ve paid off the debts, I’ll come back. I’ll come back to you. Heyan, what’s my number? We will see each other again, right?”

I gave him no answer. Looking at that final one, I spoke softly.

“Goodbye, Ji Chenfeng.”

As the light in his eyes went out completely, I didn’t dwell on whether it meant we’d never meet again or whether he had no future left at all.

All I knew was that my Mr. 26,235 was waiting for me not far away.