Chapter 15

Back at Thomas’s apartment, I packed my things, preparing to move out.

Thomas wouldn’t let me; he said he would leave.

“We haven’t finished talking… You should rest first, don’t overthink it. When you’re ready to listen, I’ll explain everything.”

Since I proposed breaking up, I hadn’t spoken to him. He didn’t agree to the breakup, and now he looked quite dejected.

Stopping my action of packing clothes, I said, “I’ve heard enough of what I wanted to know. Some things don’t need to be questioned to be understood.

“Actually, I didn’t initially think about breaking up. I just felt too wronged, always wanting to have a good fight with you to prove my existence…

“As for the reason for the breakup,” my heart ached at the thought, “I don’t want to talk about it anymore. You figure it out yourself.”

He should know, sooner or later.

The funny thing is, I still hold some hope for him, afraid to break it too quickly, fearing that once everything is said, there will be no more ‘after’ between us.

That night, Thomas left the apartment, probably went back to his mother’s place.

I lay alone in bed, repeatedly recalling what Amelia had said to me.

Call it slow or avoiding, she had hinted very clearly by the end, and only then did I face the truth.

I dreamt all night, and in the morning, I woke up at the sound of the door.

Thomas had brought breakfast upstairs.

Wearing the same clothes as yesterday, he saw me come out, “Why not sleep a bit more?”

The breakfast he bought was from the only place in town, over by the university, quite far from here.

When I met him, I had just graduated and hadn’t switched jobs yet, and loved the shumai from this place. After moving here, whenever I wanted it, he’d drive to get it. But I rarely asked, not wanting to trouble him.

I smelled the smoke on him, “Where did you go last night, didn’t go home?”

“…In the car.”

Seems like he hadn’t slept all night.

I closed my eyes and sat at the dining table.

“Don’t just stand there, eat, then shower. Whether you rest or go to work, it’s your choice.”

He forced his eyes open, a faint light in them.

He sat down uncertainly, seeing I wasn’t speaking, and silently finished breakfast with me.

I didn’t have much appetite but forced myself to eat some.

While Thomas showered, I took out the packed luggage from last night and left.

Just as I got in the car, his call came through.

I answered.

Neither of us spoke for a moment.

Before hanging up, I said, “You don’t need to do this. If you ruin your health, no one will be happy.”

…

I took two days off from work and drove back to my own place.

Luckily, I hadn’t rented it out; otherwise, I’d have nowhere to go now. But it hadn’t been visited for a while, and dust was everywhere.

Alex called while I was cleaning.

He apologized right away, “I thought you two were just having a casual fight, didn’t know it was like that… Bella, I’m sorry.”

“It’s not your fault.”

“Where are you now?”

“Did Thomas ask you to find out?”

“He guessed. But he’s afraid to come find you, worried if you leave again, he’ll be clueless.”

“…”

Alex said a lot afterward, but I don’t remember much.

In the following days, I didn’t see Thomas.

Not just him, I didn’t see Amelia either.

The next time I saw Thomas was five days later.

He was waiting at my place’s door, looking thinner, his jawline clear, with a faint stubble.

I knew. These days, he had come by, though never appearing before me, but I saw his car.

I glanced at him and went to open the door.

In the hallway, only the sound of keys unlocking was heard.

Once the door opened, he held my hand, “Bella.”

“What are you here for?”

“Did you work overtime again?”

I pulled my hand away, “I asked what you’re here for.”

“That ring, I thought it was long gone.”

Silence filled the air for a moment.

My palm couldn’t stop feeling cold, “…So what I saw was indeed the couple ring Amelia mentioned?”

“Listen to me first.”

He wrapped my hand, trying to warm me.

“Back then, searching for the ring was more about being angry with myself, and unwillingness. After finding the ring, I didn’t give it to Amelia, just tossed it in a drawer, left it for so long that I forgot it existed. If you hadn’t mentioned it, I wouldn’t have thought to find it.”

“You say you tossed it casually, but what I saw wasn’t like that.”

“My mom put it away.”

I was stunned.

“She doesn’t know anything. You know my mom, she’s nostalgic, can’t bear to throw things away… She must have found it while moving at the beginning of the year, thinking we were careless, so she kept it.”

Saying this, Thomas took out an old phone.

“She messaged me about it before, but I was in a meeting then, didn’t think it through, causing the misunderstanding.”

I looked at the phone.

On the screen, the date was from the beginning of the year.

Mom: Found some jewelry while cleaning the old house, kept it for you. Remember not to lose things again, wasteful.

Thomas replied almost half an hour later: Got it.

I stared at the screen for a long time, but didn’t feel the relief I imagined.

What Amelia said had become a thorn, deeply embedded between Thomas and me.

In my mind, two little figures appeared at this moment.

One coaxed me to forgive him.

The other questioned: Does he really not care as he says?

This ring is evidence of their time together, constantly reminding me of the beautiful relationship they once had.

If he didn’t care, why would he retrieve it?

The concealment during this period makes it hard to say if he was preserving Amelia’s dignity.

I could pretend to be magnanimous and say I don’t mind.

But how could that be possible?

Amelia had drawn me into their past emotional world, inducing me to empathize with their difficulties, making me wonder whenever I saw Thomas, did he treat Amelia like this?

It’s become a nightmare.

Such thoughts are hard to shake off, and I fear I can’t digest them in a short time.

“…I’ve already thrown the ring away. As for Amelia, I’ll handle it soon, won’t let her bother you again.”

“That’s your business.”

“Bella?”

“Thomas, we’ve already broken up.”

Many things aren’t resolved just by clearing one’s own suspicions, emotions are unpredictable… I can’t get past that hurdle in my heart.

“…” Thomas looked at me for a long time, his chest rising and falling, “I understand.”

I frowned.

He let go of my hand, “Take care.”