Chapter 9

I walked toward him.

“What’s the matter with this?”

“Besides, you didn’t even do anything, you were just trying to scare me on purpose…”

Xu Qing’s eyes darkened. Suddenly, he reached out and grabbed the back of my neck.

Then, he kissed me fiercely.

We struggled, bit, and sank into each other’s breath.

Only when we were out of air did we finally break apart, gasping.

Foreheads pressed together, the air thick with a desire so dense it couldn’t be dispelled.

I panted softly, staring at his lips, so close, glistening with moisture.

A question buried deep in my heart for so long, mixed with confusion and a trace of barely perceptible grievance.

I blurted out, “So you’re not afraid of homosexuality now? Didn’t you say before… it was disgusting?”

My voice was still hoarse and trembling from the kiss.

“Why can you kiss me now?”

Xu Qing’s body suddenly stiffened.

His fingers at the back of my neck unconsciously tightened a little.

His eyes were filled with shock and bewilderment. “What?”

“Afraid of homosexuality? When did I ever…”

He stopped mid-sentence, his brows furrowing tightly, as if frantically searching through dusty memories.

Looking at his confused expression, the thorn in my heart stabbed again, a dull pain reminding me of the humiliation of that day.

I turned my head, avoiding his gaze, my voice dropping.

“It was on your birthday, remember? I chased after you with a postcard… That’s what you said to me.”

“You said, two men together, it’s disgusting.”

Xu Qing’s breath stopped abruptly.

In an instant, his face turned deathly pale, his pupils contracting violently.

“That day… it was you?” His voice trembled uncontrollably.

He was incoherent, his breathing quickening. “I’d been stalked and harassed by some extreme sasaeng fans for a while… That afternoon, on my birthday, I went to meet a so-called sponsor, and someone put something in my drink!”

“I realized something was wrong, tried desperately to shake those people off, my mind was foggy, my whole body felt awful, I just wanted to get to a hospital as fast as possible…”

He closed his eyes in pain, and when he opened them again, they were bloodshot and filled with deep regret.

“I couldn’t see clearly at all, just felt like someone was blocking me again… I thought you were one of those sasaengs, I… I just blurted things out, all my anger at them and my panic in that moment, I… I’m sorry… I really didn’t know it was you.”

He finished with difficulty, his shoulders slumping.

I hurriedly asked, “Drugged? Were you okay after that…?”

The truth was laid bare before me in a way I never could have expected.

So on that day,

He and I, each under the capricious hand of fate, endured a torment and collapse no one else knew.