Chapter 14: A Call From Tingquan? We're Rich!

Wang Qiang shakily pointed his flashlight toward the laughter. Jiang Chen, Liu San, and Chen Ming were crouched together in a corner at the front of the burial chamber. Their shoulders bobbed as they periodically let out that eerie, wild laughter.

In the dim candlelight, the sight was more frightening than a horror movie. Viewers were beside themselves with curiosity.

【What’s going on? What are those three laughing at?】

【Did corpse poison turn them into tomb zombies?】

【Wang Qiang, run! Soon it’ll be too late! Get the black sticky rice ready!】

【What good is rice? Get a black donkey’s hoof and shove it in their mouths!】

【We’re finished. The Idea Guy has turned into the Idea Guy zombie. This really is the end.】

Fighting the urge to run, Wang Qiang stammered, “B-Brother Jiang, what are you doing?”

Jiang Chen spun around, holding up a mud-covered bronze-colored bottle. “Wang Qiang! Come here! Look what we found!”

Liu San rubbed his hands excitedly and pointed at it. “That bottle must be old! Look at the patina and the shape. It’s definitely valuable!”

Chen Ming pushed his glasses up from the tip of his nose and leaned in. “Judging by the oxidation and its reaction with minerals in the soil, this has been buried for at least two thousand years. Look at the pattern. Most of it is covered in dirt, but you can still recognize the cloud-and-thunder motif typical of the early Western Han. The workmanship and shape mark it as a burial object fit for a prince or a high official!”

Wang Qiang stood two meters away, watching the three men gaze at the freshly unearthed bottle with shining eyes. A herd of curses thundered through his mind. How were these an unemployed man, a geography teacher, and a fortune-teller? They looked like a seasoned professional tomb-robbing gang, working together far too smoothly!

When the camera showed a close-up of the muddy bronze bottle, the viewers’ eyes were opened once again.

【Holy crap! They really found a bottle!】

【That bottle looks old at a glance! It’s obviously authentic!】

【Criminal! That bottle starts at five years in prison, with no upper limit!】

【Jiang Chen: I came on the show to make money. Police: You came to help us meet our year-end targets.】

【Other amateurs come on shows for a makeover. These three are here for prison team-building!】

【Production crew, call the police! Any later and they’ll pull the tomb owner’s dentures out to sell!】

Wang Qiang found it absurd. It had to be fake, a prop buried by the crew in advance. Yes, it had to be! He kept urging the three men to leave.

“Brother Chen, Brother Liu, Mr. Chen, that’s enough. Let’s get out of here! It’s cold and damp down here. Don’t disturb the ancestors. If one of them rises from the dead, we’ll have nowhere to run!”

Jiang Chen ignored him, carefully wiping dirt from the bottle with his sleeve.

Then Wang Qiang’s livestream equipment chimed. A conspicuous request to join the call appeared on the screen. He stared. Who was calling into the show’s stream?

He looked closer and went rigid. “Wait… Tingquan is requesting to join?”

The ID read: Tingquan Antique Appraisal.

Tingquan’s sudden request sent the stream to an unprecedented peak. The viewers went wild.

【What?! Tingquan wants to join?!】

【Even the master himself has appeared! That thing must be obviously genuine!】

【Tingquan: I usually appraise family heirlooms for callers. Today I’m appraising stolen goods at the original crime scene!】

【A dream crossover between the crime channel and the antiques channel.】

The show had a rule against accepting outside calls during livestreams, to prevent unpredictable broadcast incidents. Wang Qiang instinctively reached for reject. He was panicked enough already and wanted no further complications.

Before his finger touched the screen, Jiang Chen snatched the device and pressed the green accept button. The screen split in two, and Tingquan’s recognizable face appeared, framed by black glasses.

Tingquan leaned back dramatically, eyes wide at the background. “Bro, that’s a creepy setting. The lighting, the brick walls… don’t tell me you’re underground?”

Jiang Chen grinned. “Good eye, Brother Quan. We just dug the robber’s hole. Fresh off the shovel.”

Tingquan swallowed, the corners of his mouth twitching. “Bro, that’s hardcore. Can you bring that thing in your hand closer?”

Jiang Chen held the bronze bottle up to the camera. Tingquan leaned toward the screen and narrowed his eyes. After only three seconds, he slapped his thigh and sprang out of his gaming chair.

“Oh my god! Authentic! Absolutely authentic! Unmistakable, brother!”

He waved his hands, too excited to speak coherently. “Where did you dig that up? The patina, the surface, the layers of soil staining! That’s definitely a Western Han bronze *fang* vessel inlaid with gold and silver!”

Jiang Chen raised an eyebrow. “Dug it out of the hole under my feet just now.”

Tingquan took a deep breath and gave the camera a thumbs-up. “Bro, if that thing is real, you’ll never have to worry again. Provided you live long enough to spend the money and don’t end up sewing uniforms in prison.”

Jiang Chen turned to his teammates. “See? Even a major antiques influencer says it’s authentic! We’re rich!”

Liu San shook with excitement, slapped his thigh, and laughed up at the heavens. “Ha ha ha! Heaven has eyes! I’ll never have to tell fortunes under that overpass in the wind and sun again! I’m buying a mansion! I’ll eat and drink like a king!”

Chen Ming pushed up his glasses, his face alight with the joy of an academic breakthrough. “With these artifacts, my research funding is settled. I won’t have to go back to teaching. I’ll open my own research institute!”

Wang Qiang stared, numb, at the three men lost in their fantasies. He turned to the camera and shouted, “Director! Do something! They’re really planning to empty this tomb!”