Xiaoxiao and Mo Yan - Chapter 2

My past was both absurd and turbulent.

Until I was fourteen, I was a beggar in a poor alley. I roamed the streets dressed as a boy. It was the only way I could survive.

Mo Yan was the son of a drunk who lived in the same alley. Whenever his father drank, he beat him. Mo Yan was too clever to stand there and take it. Each time he ran away, he came to find me.

Hah. If he hadn’t been so cute, I would never have shared my food.

Not long after, the drunk lost money he had no way of repaying. The people from a brothel for male courtesans saw Mo Yan’s pretty face and bought him from his father.

The next time I saw him, he wore a sheer red outfit far finer than anything he’d owned before. It outlined his slender waist. At ten, he was tender and young, with round eyes as innocent as could be.

The brothel raised and trained him carefully, planning to fetch a high price when he grew up.

Mo Yan whispered in my ear, “Xiaoxiao, after my first night, I’ll let you have a good time.”

I was a girl, but I got a real thrill out of it.

I counted the copper coins in my hand and imagined becoming a wealthy master someday. Then I could buy Mo Yan and spend every day and night with him.

But it was just a fantasy. I knew a little beggar like me had no business dreaming of it.

I never expected that daydream to come true.

At fourteen, I didn’t become a wealthy master. Instead, I became the young lady of a grand household, like someone out of a storybook.

It was a strange tale. The prime minister in the capital was my father, and his wife was my mother. When Mother gave birth, a wicked servant switched the babies. It was a wildcat-for-the-crown-prince tale: the false daughter grew up in silks, while the true one begged for food in the alleys.

Strangers held me and wept over me for a while. Then a beautiful, dignified young woman appeared. Mother awkwardly introduced her as my elder sister.

Sister? She was the false daughter who had taken my place.

I watched everyone’s faces. The worry, concern, and pity were all for her.

I understood. More than ten years of affection couldn’t simply be discarded. Besides, how could a beggar compare with a noble young lady who’d spent years being groomed for her station?

So I embraced her warmly on the spot. “We’ll be the best of sisters from now on!”

Everyone relaxed and smiled.

My own thoughts were on the boy in red. He had grown even more beautiful.

Before I left for the capital, I slipped away from everyone to see Mo Yan. He stood beneath a large tree with his hands behind his back, at the place where we usually held our “secret meetings.”

He froze at the sight of me. It was the first time he’d seen me dressed as a girl, and I was wearing silk and satin. I looked rich and noble.

“Mo Yan, I’m a girl.”

His eyes widened in confusion. “You, you, you… What did you say?”

I put a hand on him. We were about the same height.

“Can you believe it? I’m the daughter of a wealthy family now. Soon I’ll be going back to the capital with them.”

I told him what had happened.

His first response was, “Then… then can I still make you happy?”

For a moment I was speechless. Then I gritted my teeth. “Don’t think I can’t have my way with you just because I don’t have what a man has. You wait!”

Mo Yan was two years older than me, already sixteen and old enough to know about such things. He was at his freshest and most enticing. Naturally, the brothel wasn’t going to let that opportunity pass. They had begun arranging clients for him, though nothing much could happen yet. It was publicity, meant to drive up the price of his first night.

When I returned to the capital, the prime minister’s household gave me plenty of money out of guilt. Oh, and the position of their second legitimate daughter.

The eldest legitimate daughter, of course, was my “sister,” Gu Jinya.

I secretly used the money to assemble a merchant caravan, traveled to Yangzhou, and bought Mo Yan. I found him a house. I hadn’t intended to bring him to the capital.

Then Gu Luochen found me.

“I cannot be the princess’s husband,” he said. “I can bring him here so you can be together. The stain on my reputation will be mine to bear.”

That was the first time I realized what a talent my elder brother was.

“When you found out your sister was keeping a lover, I thought you’d beat us both to death. Or at least one of us. It would disgrace the prime minister’s household. I never expected you to support us.”

He frowned slightly and looked straight at me. “Don’t think of it that way. We’re the ones who wronged you. You’ve suffered for so many years, and I know your nature isn’t going to change. Consider Mo Yan my way of making amends. Father and Mother won’t know. They probably couldn’t accept it.”