Chapter 6

As we passed by Shasha, she reached out and grabbed me.

Her hand was thin and cold.

Her whole body carried a faint scent of blood.

She didn’t say a word, but I knew she didn’t want me to return the dress.

Mom pulled me harder.

With force coming from both sides, I frowned in pain.

Shasha let go of me.

Mom rummaged under the wardrobe and found the dress. I clung to it tightly, refusing to let go.

“Shasha gave this to me!

“Mom, can you pay Aunt Zhao for the dress? I’ll be good from now on, I’ll save up and pay you back.

“You buy whatever my brother wants, can’t you just let me have this one thing?”

Mom was furious: “Didn’t you hear what they said about you and me?”

“You’ve embarrassed me all the way to the Pacific Ocean, and you still want to keep this piece of junk!”

Her eyes were red and she choked up: “My family lives far away, your aunt and uncle all look down on me, the women in the village gossip behind my back, and now even you want to treat me like this…”

She was strong, and she snatched the dress away.

She stormed back to the pond and threw the dress in Aunt Zhao’s face.

“Take it back. If my Xiaoxia wants a dress, I’ll buy it for her myself.”

Aunt Zhao sneered: “Oh, you’re all talk. After all these years, I’ve never seen you buy her one…”

The next morning, Mom went to town and bought me a dress.

It was more expensive than the one Shasha gave me.

She made me put it on and told me to go out and play, especially so Aunt Zhao would see.

The dress was a bit long, almost reaching my ankles.

It was drafty under the armpits, too.

Mom said:

“This dress cost twenty-five yuan, so of course I bought it big. That way you can wear it for a few more years.

“You kept begging for a dress, now I’ve bought you one.

“From now on, you can’t say I favor your brother anymore.”

I finally got the dress I’d dreamed of.

Everyone said it looked nice.

Even Shasha said so.

But I wasn’t happy at all.

I only wore that dress once. After washing it, I folded it neatly and put it in the wardrobe.

It wasn’t until I was in middle school that I took it out and tried it on.

The dress that had once been as wide as a costume now barely reached the tops of my thighs-it didn’t fit anymore.

After my tenth birthday, I changed a lot.

I started openly playing with Shasha.

I would fight my brother for the chicken drumstick, and I would argue fiercely with my parents for things I wanted.

I would accuse them of favoritism, my face flushed and my neck stiff.

When Dad chased me with a broom, I’d run barefoot, crying and shouting that I wasn’t wrong.

Mom often sighed: “Did you get possessed by a ghost?”

“You used to be so well-behaved, but ever since you started playing with Shasha every day, she’s led you astray.”

Shasha asked me, “Does going against your parents every day actually help?”