Chapter 1

Before I met Jiang Lu, I didn’t know there was a name for her type: a one-of-the-guys bitch.

Jiang Lu was a woman, and she was my boyfriend Chen Wei’s best buddy.

He’d told me they’d known each other for over ten years.

Back then, I naively assumed his female friend would be easygoing and fun. Maybe we’d even become good friends ourselves.

Then we met. Without a second thought, Jiang Lu draped her legs across Chen Wei’s lap.

“My legs are killing me after that walk. Come on, give your big bro a massage.”

Only then did she look me up and down and give a little laugh.

“So you’re Chen Wei’s girlfriend? We’ve known each other forever. You don’t mind, do you, girl?”

Before I could answer, Chen Wei said, “She doesn’t.”

So casually.

As though he knew for a fact I’d never get angry.

……

Chen Wei and I were seniors at the same college, about to graduate.

With both of us doing internships, we’d rented an apartment off campus.

I loved him. He’d once pulled me out of the darkest despair, and I’d always believed we’d stay together forever.

Then Jiang Lu showed up, and I began to question that conviction.

She was our age and had gone to college in another city. In her senior year, she came back to Beijing for an internship and started turning up in our lives all the time.

The first time we met, I could tell her relationship with Chen Wei was unusual.

They seemed far too close.

Chen Wei explained that this was how buddies acted. If I just thought of Jiang Lu as a guy, it wouldn’t seem strange.

Maybe I was overthinking it, I told myself. Maybe they really were just close friends.

Two days later, Chen Wei and I were gaming when Jiang Lu asked to join us. I stopped smiling.

His username was “Cuocuo’s Caowei.” I’d always assumed “Cuocuo” was just some descriptive word.

But Jiang Lu’s username was “Cuocuo Loud and Proud.”

I stared at their names. “Are those matching couple names?”

“No,” Chen Wei said. “When we first made our accounts, she chose hers first, then made all of us use ‘Cuocuo’s Whatever.'”

“All of who?”

“The guys. You know them.”

“But they don’t use names like that.”

“Oh, they changed theirs later. I just forgot. Come on, it’s starting!”

I wasn’t in the mood to play. I wanted him to explain.

He grew impatient. “If they’re couple names, may lightning strike me dead the second I go outside, okay? Ask the guys if you don’t believe me. Can we talk about it after this round?”

Our mics were off during this conversation. Over the game’s voice chat, Jiang Lu called to us, “What are you standing around for? Quit dragging your feet and get over here.”

“Cuocuo’s Caowei” hurried over.

Jiang Lu talked to Chen Wei the whole game.

“You little shit! Stealing my blue buff? Want Daddy to kick your ass?”

“Ha! You suck, Chen Wei.”

I kept my mic off. Listening to them left a bad taste in my mouth.

When the blue buff respawned, Chen Wei called, “Babe, come get blue.”

I started running toward him.

One of our randomly matched teammates switched on his mic. “Dude, have some mercy on us single people. Isn’t your girl standing right next to you?”

I froze.

The player beside Chen Wei was “Cuocuo Loud and Proud.”

Our teammate had gotten the wrong idea.

Jiang Lu acted as though she hadn’t heard. Her mic stayed off.

“That’s not my girlfriend,” Chen Wei explained. “‘Suisui, Safe and Sound’ is.”

I stopped heading toward him and went somewhere else.

“Why aren’t you coming?” he asked.

“I’m not coming. It respawned somewhere else, too.”

“Oh.”

In the end, Jiang Lu got that blue buff anyway.

I had a nagging feeling that my peaceful life was about to go the same way: straight into Jiang Lu’s hands.

After the game, I insisted that Chen Wei change his username. He did.

I thought that was the end of it. Then I saw his WeChat messages.

Jiang Lu: Why’d you change your name?

Chen Wei: My girlfriend made me.

Jiang Lu: [Shocked.jpg] She doesn’t seriously mind our usernames, does she?

Chen Wei: A little…

Jiang Lu: Is she mad?

Chen Wei: Yeah.

Jiang Lu: Unbelievable. After all the years we’ve been friends, what’s there to be mad about? So ridiculous… See, this is why I only hang out with guys. Girls are such a pain.

Chen Wei hadn’t replied. Maybe he hadn’t seen it. Maybe he hadn’t wanted to answer.

Either way, I was furious.