The Unremarkable Little Taoist Master

The new day began in a haze, as the old man dragged me out of bed as usual.

These past few days have been the most peaceful time for me, because although the old man is shameless and annoying, being with him gives me a strong sense of security.

Despite this calmness, I’ve been feeling an ominous premonition lately, as if I’m being ensnared by something.

The more uneasy I felt, the more anxious I became. It wasn’t fear; it was because the old man had done a divination for me and said that a fatal calamity had arrived.

I frowned at the results. The old man said the divination indicated that I was destined for certain death, that this calamity was a debt I owed. I helplessly pondered what debts I could have incurred.

The old man, growing impatient, said, “Kid, stop overthinking it. Some things are predetermined; we can only do what we can and leave the rest to fate.”

I shook my head and gave a wry smile, thinking that perhaps this is just my fate. I started to close my eyes and accept it.

The old man was eager to calculate when this calamity would strike so we could have some preparations in place, while I stood beside him with a grim expression.

After a long while, the old man let out a deep sigh.

“Kid, this is really troublesome; it’s actually related to a fierce ghost.”

Suddenly, the old man spat out a mouthful of blood. Looking at the blood before him, he sighed again.

“Your future is shrouded; I wanted to peek into it, but merely having that thought has harmed me. It seems your fate is not so simple.”

After saying this, the old man silently put away his divination tools and gazed at the sky outside.

I followed behind him in silence.

“Are you scared?”

Seeing the seriousness on the old man’s face, I chuckled softly.

“Maybe, but even knowing there’s a calamity ahead, I won’t give up struggling.”

After hearing my words, the old man suddenly revealed a lewd smile.

“I’m not sure how to help you prepare to escape this calamity, but I remembered a method used by a senior from Mao Mountain to evade retaliation from fierce ghosts.”

After hearing the old man’s words, I immediately displayed a look of surprise.

“What method? Did the last senior succeed?”

“This method is simple in theory but difficult in practice. It’s the technique of faking one’s death. By pretending to be dead, a person’s life force can seem to completely vanish. I think this trick might help us evade the calamity.”

“How does this faking death technique work?” I asked, my face full of confusion.

The old man quickly turned around and pulled out a somewhat yellowed book from his coat, hurriedly flipping through its pages, searching for something.

“This book details the methods used by a senior from Mao Mountain to evade fierce ghosts. A previous disciple of Mao Mountain once developed this peculiar method.”

After saying this, the old man continued to search through the book.

“I found it!” The old man suddenly shouted with excitement.

I rushed over and grabbed the book from his hands.

I scanned the methods listed in the book and found that only one was applicable to me-not because it was better than the others, but because it was the only one that suited my situation. I helplessly glanced at the description on the page.

The next day, the old man took me to the market, where we gathered all the necessary items and some tools. I stared at the large bags in front of me, feeling reluctant to express any complaints.

After returning to the shop with our haul, the old man and I began the intense preparations in the room.

The method described in the book resembled a luxurious gamble; success meant survival, while failure spelled death. I felt incredibly tense, as we were up against formidable odds.

If it were easy to subdue them, the old man would have long since descended the mountain and dealt with them himself. There would be no need for all these stories.

Since we couldn’t fight them head-on, all I could do was use this method to evade the situation. Although it was a gamble, I felt I had no choice but to take the risk.

I couldn’t help but bitterly smile, realizing that I seemed to have no real options in any situation. Why was my fate so harsh?

I picked up my phone tools and began preparing with great urgency, working tirelessly until deep into the night. As I dragged my exhausted body and gazed at the tools before me, a smile crept onto my lips.

Finally, I managed to solve my predicament, and I felt a sense of relief while looking at the items scattered around me.

Deeply fatigued, I drifted off to sleep. The next morning, I was awakened by pangs of hunger. As I opened my eyes, I saw the old man happily cooking in the kitchen.

Watching his swaying body and hearing the little tune he hummed, I could tell he was in a good mood today. I walked into the kitchen.

The old man squinted his crescent-shaped eyes at me and smiled. “You’re awake? You must be starving. The food will be ready soon; we can eat in just a moment.”

Seeing the old man’s joyful expression, I didn’t want to burst his bubble. I simply smiled and returned to my bedroom, preparing to wait for the old man to bring up that nightmarish meal.

The taste is something I still can’t forget-worse than any poison in the world. I closed my eyes and tried not to think about it, but the involuntary twitching of my lips betrayed my inner fear.

I endured tears as I finished the meal. Looking at the old man’s delighted expression as he savored his creation only made me feel worse. Truly, one always thinks their own cooking is the best.

He probably believes what he made is the most delicious food on earth. Looking at his face, I can guarantee that’s what he thinks. I let out a helpless, bitter smile.

If only Xinger were here; she’d definitely give the old man a run for his money. But I couldn’t argue with the old man like she did; after all, I couldn’t outtalk his incessant chatter.

Noticing my sorrowful expression, the old man innocently said, “Is my cooking really that good? Why do you look like that?”

I nodded like a chick pecking at grain and insincerely said, “Daoist Priest, your cooking is absolutely the best I’ve ever eaten. It’s incredibly delicious.”

The old man seemed to enjoy that compliment as he rubbed his mouth, laughing, “If you think it’s that good, I’ll cook for you every day. How about that?”

I let out a wail and pretended to faint. The old man, with a smug smile, said, “I feel like I’m more suited to be a chef. Who knew my cooking could be this delicious? What a waste of my talent!”

Hearing his shameless words made me want to jump up and give him a good beating, but for the sake of my own life, I held back.

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