Please Dote on Me - Novelbike

Chinei continued speaking.

“Do you know why Shichui often skipped classes back then? It wasn’t because he was ditching school. You said you loved him, yet you didn’t even know this. Shichui was admitted to Heiyin High School as a special music student because of his exceptional talent in music. He had special permission not to attend classes so he could practice with his band. After he fell for you, he was preparing to write a song for you, keeping his musical dreams and band a secret to surprise you. When his father told him they were moving back to their home country, Shichui begged to stay, but his father refused. So, the stubborn Shichui left Heiyin High School, determined to stay in China on his own. He didn’t want you to worry about him before he succeeded, so he left your city without a word. Five years ago, Shichui was no longer the timid coward you imagined. He was already a responsible man. To prove his abilities, Shichui and his band performed in bars every night, often practicing so hard that he didn’t have time to eat. You loved him, yet you knew nothing about all this. The car accident did happen, but the outcome wasn’t what I told you. Shichui is alive and well now. If you hadn’t shown up, maybe he would be living even better.”

“Maybe if you hadn’t appeared, he and I would have had a perfect ending. I was gradually making him forget you. Do you know how hard that is? But I was so close to succeeding. When he couldn’t find you, I lied to both you and him. I told him to forget you because you had a new boyfriend and were very happy. I said you moved away to escape his entanglement. Shichui hated you for that. He poured all his energy into his work, and his success today is thanks to you. He said he had to become famous, to have all the entertainment news report on his scandals, so you would know he could live without you. When you appeared again, Shichui told me he wanted to pursue you to get revenge. But then he started to get genuinely involved, almost forgetting that chasing you was just to dump you. Hearing this broke my heart. If you hadn’t shown up, no matter how many scandals Shichui created, he would eventually realize that I was the one who truly loved him. But you appeared mercilessly. Have you been planning to show up ever since you found out Shichui became famous? Have you always wanted to return to his side? Is that it?”

I didn’t answer Chinei’s questions. I tried to remember something, but all my efforts were in vain. I couldn’t find any traces of the past in my mind.

I, Qi Yang, once studied at Heiyin High School. I have a younger brother named Wen Rou Jing. I know this. We became siblings before attending Heiyin High School. These memories are well-preserved. But I have no recollection of the things Chinei mentioned. I’m not lying.

“Changing his name to enter the entertainment industry, transforming from Heize Yangjie to Shichui Mingyan, you destroyed Heize Yangjie and created Shichui Mingyan. Did you ever love Heize? You didn’t even understand him. All you knew was that Shichui was the most commercially valuable artist. Being with him could bring you fame and fortune. How are you any different from those foolish entertainment companies? You don’t understand Shichui at all. You just want him to endlessly generate commercial profit. You don’t deserve to find him. You’re reaching too high…”

“Enough! Chinei! You’ve gone too far! Even now, you want to continue? What exactly have you done?” Shichui struggled to control his tears but couldn’t suppress his anger.

“I can’t distinguish between love and hate anymore. Are love and hate ultimately the same? Is that it? I went to great lengths to be with you. I could use any means necessary. I could give up everything. In the end, I couldn’t stop. Shichui, I can’t stop.” Chinei cried uncontrollably.

Heize Yangjie. This name echoed heavily in my mind through all of Chinei’s words.

At this moment, should these so-called truths that seem unrelated to me be revealed? It’s not up to me. As the unfamiliar story slowly unfolded from Chinei Youmi’s mouth, I felt myself gradually weakening.

Did Shichui Mingyan, standing before me, ever love me? If so, where did that love exist? I seem to have never discovered it, yet I have never lost it either.

Is this the answer?

Is this the answer to all the doubts?

If so, then let it be. If the past leaves no trace in my heart, then let it go.

No one loses anything except for sadness. I no longer want to hear about this matter. I refuse to continue exploring the truth, even though it might be important to me. I’m really afraid of uncovering any truth.

“Chinei, please don’t talk about this anymore, okay?” I came back to my senses. “Shichui, she’s drunk. Take her home.”

The truth of things is always different from what we imagine. Life always contains a touch of ironic black humor.