Mountain and Sea Canteen - Chapter 2

Inside a health supplement shop in Jiangyu City, invisible to ordinary people.

“Boss Golden Crow¹, you’ve come at just the right time!” exclaimed a cheerful girl with rabbit ear hairbands. “We just got a new batch of Jiarong Grass Oral Liquid. Drink it, and you-no, your friend-will never be struck by lightning again.”

Golden Crow remained silent, staring at the label of the Jiarong Grass Oral Liquid. The Cunning Critter never spoke a word of truth. If he weren’t desperate, he wouldn’t have come to her.

The rabbit-eared girl continued, “Even though my reputation isn’t great, how could I dare deceive you? I drink this Jiarong Grass Oral Liquid myself. Otherwise, after tricking so many gods and demons, why haven’t I been struck by Heaven Thunder?”

This made Golden Crow slightly tempted.

No one had ever taught him logic, so all sorts of information swirled in his mind. Golden Crow appeared calm, but in reality, he was utterly confused.

Known facts: 1. Jiarong Grass indeed has lightning-deterrent properties. 2. The Cunning Critter’s words are most likely untrustworthy. 3. The Cunning Critter doesn’t seem to have been struck by lightning.

Golden Crow furrowed his brows deeply and finally said, “Here’s the money.”

The Cunning Critter swiftly displayed the payment QR code: “All sales are final, no returns or exchanges~”

Golden Crow bent down to pick up the large gift box of Jiarong Grass, and the Cunning Critter subtly stepped back, hiding a charred rabbit foot behind the counter.

Golden Crow had been troubled lately.

Once favored by the heavens, he now found himself struck by lightning every few days, leaving his meticulously cared-for feathers in disarray. He had sought out various experts and Exotic Beasts, but no one could figure out the reason. Out of options, he had turned to the Cunning Critter.

If this Jiarong Grass Oral Liquid worked, spending some mortal money would be worth it. Golden Crow thought to himself.

“Stop!”

A sharp voice called out from behind. Golden Crow, oblivious, continued walking.

“I’m talking to you,” Ying Linglong ran up and stood in front of him. “So, you’re the guy called Golden Crow?”

Golden Crow didn’t look sunny at all. His eyes were gloomy, and he appeared to be around eighteen or nineteen years old, with a faint golden shimmer at the corners of his eyes. He was strikingly handsome but also carried an air of arrogance.

“Who are you?” Golden Crow frowned, displeased. He didn’t recognize her. But was she even human? With that thought, he scrutinized her more closely.

Ying Linglong declared confidently, “Your creditor.”

With that, she opened the large hiking backpack behind her, revealing a bronze mirror inside. The mirror spat out a piece of paper, which Ying Linglong took and slapped onto Golden Crow’s chest.

“Simply put, you owe me two hundred thousand.”

The paper read: [Golden Crow’s feather loss caused a mountain fire, blatantly violating forest and grassland fire prevention regulations, and unauthorized use of fire in a wildfire-prone area. Fine: 200,000. In dry weather, all Yaoguai, especially fire-attribute ones, are reminded to avoid all fire sources in the mountains and strictly prevent forest fires. Violators will be severely punished!]

It was stamped with the official seal of the Yaoguai Management Bureau.

Below was the bank statement from the Tianwu Sect: Payment of Fine – Golden Crow -200,000 yuan.

Seeing Golden Crow frozen in place, only the hand holding the paper trembling slightly, Ying Linglong, fearing he might run, quickly grabbed his arm and said, “You’re not thinking of not paying, are you? If you don’t repay your debts, you’ll be struck by lightning!”

Golden Crow’s reaction was even more intense. He suddenly realized, “I understand!”

“Ouch!” Ying Linglong withdrew her hand, stepping back with a look of disgust. “You’re so hot! No wonder you have no friends in the summer. What do you understand?”

Golden Crow’s eyes widened, the golden patterns at the corners of his eyes glowing as he muttered, “So it’s because of this karma.”

In the past, he rarely ventured into the human world, so naturally, he had no money in his account. The Yaoguai Management Bureau couldn’t find him, so they deducted the money from the Tianwu Sect’s account, which had somehow appeared, burdening him with this inexplicable karma.

Golden Crow immediately pulled out his phone: “I’ll transfer the money to you.” After the transfer, the faint sense of restraint on him indeed loosened somewhat.

Ying Linglong nodded, “That’s more like it.” She had thought Golden Crow might try to dodge the debt, but he was surprisingly straightforward.

She glanced down: “Five thousand? You owe me two hundred thousand! It’s been so many years, and I haven’t even charged you interest. How can you have the nerve to pay in installments?” This amount wasn’t even enough to cover Boss Huang’s vegetable bill!

Golden Crow stammered, “You’re too late; the money’s all gone.” He looked at the Jiarong Grass Oral Liquid in his hand and turned to return it to the Cunning Critter, only to find that both the Cunning Critter and the shop had vanished!

He explained to Ying Linglong how the Cunning Critter had swindled all his money and fled.

Ying Linglong pressed her throbbing temple and closed her eyes: “I don’t want to hear it, and I don’t care. You must repay the money.”

Before Golden Crow could respond, the sound of thunder rumbled in the sky. Ying Linglong, unaware of the reason, held the pot in her arms over her head: “Is it going to rain?”

Golden Crow thought of his once-silken feathers, now ragged and uneven, which had made him too ashamed to return to his true form for years. He couldn’t withstand another lightning strike.

Seeing Ying Linglong’s determined stance of not leaving without her money, Chongming Bird tried to negotiate, “There are other Yaoguai who owe you money, right? Let me take you to collect from them. Once you get the money, you can use it first, and I’ll pay you back as soon as I have the funds.”

Ying Linglong, realizing he probably couldn’t come up with more money, reluctantly agreed, “Fine.”

She then turned to the mirror and asked, “Uncle Cave, who owes the second most?”

Knock, knock, knock.

The sound of knocking echoed, and the door creaked open slightly. An arm reached out, grabbing at the air, “Just hand me the takeout.”

“Chongming Bird, pay up!” Ying Linglong yanked the door open.

Upon seeing the scene inside, she slammed the door shut again, “Chongming Bird, why aren’t you wearing any clothes!”

In that brief glimpse, Ying Linglong only remembered a sun-kissed, healthy tan body with well-defined muscles-broad shoulders, a narrow waist, and as he hurriedly moved away, his buttocks seemed quite perky?

After a while, Chongming Bird, now dressed, opened the door again, sounding somewhat embarrassed, “You can come in now.”

He didn’t recognize Ying Linglong but knew Golden Crow. Besides, Ying Linglong had directly revealed his true form, so she was definitely one of them.

Chongming had hastily thrown on a shirt, the buttons not fully done, leaving his chest exposed. His well-defined pectoral muscles swayed in front of Ying Linglong, dampening her debt-collecting fervor.

She touched her nose and said, “Uh, I didn’t know you didn’t wear clothes at home. Sorry about that just now.”

Chongming, being magnanimous, casually replied, “I don’t mind, just didn’t want to scare you.”

Ying Linglong felt slightly reassured, but the Cave Mirror in her backpack angrily shouted, “Don’t be fooled by him. He’s just a perverted bird who likes to run around naked.”

Ying Linglong wanted to quickly move past this unexpected situation and get to the point. However, the Cave Mirror kept on talking, and since the mirror had no mouth, Ying Linglong couldn’t stop it. “In the first volume of ‘Records of the Lost,’ it’s recorded that Chongming Bird: ‘looks like a chicken, sounds like a phoenix. Sometimes it sheds its feathers and flies with bare wings.'”

The Cave Mirror continued, “Since your cultural level isn’t very high, let me explain it to you. Thousands of years ago, the Zhi Zhi Kingdom presented a Chongming Bird to Emperor Yao. This bird looked like a chicken, sounded like a phoenix, and had shed all its feathers, flying around with two bare wings.”

He concluded, “Thus, it’s clear that Chongming Bird has had this peculiar habit since ancient times. Linglong, it’s not your fault.”

Chongming Bird didn’t want to discuss whether he had been an exhibitionist since ancient times, so he quickly interrupted, “What do you need from me?”

Golden Crow succinctly said, “You owe her money. Pay her back.”

Chongming carefully looked at Ying Linglong and was shocked, “But I don’t know you!”

Not knowing the details didn’t matter; Ying Linglong was glad she had brought the Cave Mirror as solid evidence.

The mirror’s surface displayed vivid images:

In Chongming’s live stream, he was warmly interacting with his “family” in the chat when someone reminded him, “Host, your contact lens is slipping.”

Chongming, caught up in the moment, immediately retorted, “I was born with double pupils!” As he spoke, his four eyeballs rolled around.

But his triumph didn’t last long. His live stream was swiftly banned by the Yaoguai Management Bureau.

Not only that, but he was also fined 50,000 yuan for violating the non-human internet live streaming regulations. The fine was charged to the Tianwu Sect’s account and had occurred not long ago, directly causing Ying Linglong’s financial woes.

Chongming lamented, “No wonder I can’t open my live stream anymore.”

Golden Crow, eager to extricate himself, threatened, “If you don’t pay back the money, you’ll be struck by lightning, and all your feathers will fall off.”

Chongming replied with nonchalance, “Really? I actually like being featherless.”

Ying Linglong, however, was puzzled, “Uncle Cave, I remember it was more than 50,000 yuan. Can you show me the bill?”

The Cave Mirror gathered energy for two seconds before angrily spewing out an endless stream of bank statements.

Ying Linglong was shocked. She leaned over to look at the bill and suddenly realized, “Chongming, so you’re a borderline male streamer!”

Who would have thought? Chongming Bird, with your honest face, you… Oh wait, considering your past glorious deeds, it’s not that surprising.

Apart from the largest fine of 50,000 yuan, the bill was filled with small penalties of 100 yuan each, labeled as “[Platform determined the live stream contained explicit content].”

Chongming shook his head like a rattle drum: “I didn’t! Let me explain!”

Golden Crow leaned in to glance at the bill, his gaze growing more serious as he looked at Chongming. Spirit energy was declining, and while many Yaoguai had fallen on hard times, some had even turned to banditry, but to end up in such a profession was truly a sign of the times… He shook his head slightly in disdain.

Ying Linglong draped the two-meter-long bill around Chongming’s neck like a ceremonial scarf: “I’m very open-minded and respect all professions. Honestly, I just want my money back. You don’t need to explain anything to me.”

But Chongming insisted on explaining, so Ying Linglong and Golden Crow had no choice but to listen.

The story began six months ago when Chongming arrived in the human world. He failed to obtain his Qualification Certificate for Walking in the Human World, which meant he couldn’t walk among humans, but he was granted special permission to surf the internet.

This was an exception made by the Yaoguai Management Bureau for Chongming Bird, due to his unique nature. He was a bird who was particularly fond of humans.

This was evident from the many folk tales about Chongming Bird interacting with humans, far more than those about Golden Crow. Stories of him driving away wild beasts and evil spirits for humans, or returning year after year to visit familiar humans, were too numerous to count.

Golden Crow never did such things.

Chongming Bird especially liked upright and virtuous people. His affection for humans was akin to a human seeing a fluffy, round kitten and being unable to resist the urge to cuddle and nuzzle it.

To satisfy Chongming’s “human addiction,” the Yaoguai Management Bureau set up a live stream for him, allowing him to interact with people through the internet without scaring them-safe, convenient, and efficient.

Chongming was thrilled and eagerly started streaming. His equipment was rudimentary: a laptop borrowed from the Yaoguai Management Bureau, using the built-in webcam with its inherent noise and pixelation, which blurred his handsome face. Naturally, his stream was cold and deserted, with hardly any viewers.

Occasionally, a few curious souls would type in the chat:

-“Host, you look quite young. Are you still in school?”

At that time, Chongming was still mindful of the Yaoguai Management Bureau’s instructions and replied cautiously, “I haven’t read many books.”

-“I see you stream for long hours every day. Are you doing this full-time? The streaming industry is pretty saturated; it’s hard to stand out. It might be better to find a job first and treat streaming as a side gig.”

Chongming thought to himself that the Yaoguai Management Bureau didn’t allow him to work, as he hadn’t passed the Qualification Certificate for Walking in the Human World.

Chongming: “I can’t work outside. There are… some difficulties.”

-“Is your current income enough to cover your daily expenses?”

Chongming thought about it. He didn’t have many expenses, so he said, “I eat very little.” In fact, he didn’t need to eat at all.

[Summer Shadows] gifted “Rocket” ×5!

[Soft Ice] gifted “Cake” ×1!

Chongming: They seem to have misunderstood something.

Later, Chongming used the money from viewer donations to buy a second-hand webcam. After upgrading his equipment, the stream’s popularity indeed increased. Encouraged, Chongming focused all his efforts on attracting more viewers and bought a [Quick Guide to Becoming a Popular Streamer] from another streamer’s channel. When he opened it, he found only one sentence inside:

“To get famous, you have to dare to strip.”

At the time, the naive Chongming didn’t realize he had been scammed by an unscrupulous streamer and foolishly followed the advice.

“After that, so many people came to talk to me. It was really lively.”

He said sadly, “Now that the stream is gone, many people are still waiting for me.”

Although Chongming’s stream was temporarily banned multiple times for exceeding content guidelines, considering his need for regular “human interaction,” the Yaoguai Management Bureau made an exception and didn’t permanently ban his account like they would for ordinary streamers who repeatedly violated the rules.

However, the incident with the slipped contact lenses was more serious, and Chongming was unlikely to resume his streaming career.

Ying Linglong listened with great interest: “With such a popular stream, you must have made a lot of money!”

Chongming’s expression stiffened: “Actually, I didn’t earn much. Besides, I do have expenses. Although I don’t need to eat, I enjoy Jade Essence, which people used to offer me as a tribute.”

Ying Linglong said coldly, “Speak human language.”

At that moment, the door was knocked again, and Chongming skillfully reached out to take a delivery bag from outside.

He pulled out a bottle of Baijiu² from his pocket and summarized succinctly, “All the money went to buying alcohol.”

Footnote:

1. Golden Crow(金乌):The mythical bird in Chinese mythology that symbolizes the sun and light.
2. Baijiu(白酒):Baijiu is a traditional Chinese distilled liquor, typically made from grains such as sorghum, corn, and wheat. It has a much higher alcohol content compared to beer, making it significantly stronger.