After I Was Gone, Mr. Song Said He Loved Me

Gasping for air, I clutched my neck, my chest heaving dramatically. Song Yu, equally out of breath, stood in front of me like a towering wall, his shadow enveloping me. His intimidating presence almost stifled my breath. Blood dripped from the knuckles of my right hand, forming a glaring red pool on the floor, adding a dangerous air between us.

I swallowed hard, my heart pounding erratically as I braced myself for the next onslaught.

However, after a tense, prolonged silence, Song Yu took two steps back, turned around without a word, and left the bathroom.

Watching his retreating figure, I closed my eyes weakly, my body going limp, and I sighed quietly through slightly parted lips.

Song Yu hadn’t touched me, nor had he done anything excessive.

Despite the fiercely perilous atmosphere just moments ago, he had spared me, just like that time I had gone to meet Zhang Jishu on my own. Song Yu had lost control then too, but this time it was clearly much more severe.

In those brief minutes, I was genuinely afraid he might kill me.

Honestly, I was terrified, especially when facing an opponent so much stronger than myself. Human frailty can be immensely magnified.

But I couldn’t back down, thinking of Lu, who had died miserably, I had to persevere.

I believed Song Yu wasn’t bold enough to commit murder at the company. As long as he spared me, I would have a chance to avenge Lu. That was my motivation to keep going.

Fortunately, my gamble paid off.

After today’s incident, I was sure Song Yu would no longer have any physical ties with me. After all, with his status, why would he entangle himself with someone else’s lover?

I looked at the golden business card that had fallen out of my pocket on the floor, a smug smile curling at the corners of my mouth.

For Song Yu, his own dog not heeding his commands but instead going to someone else must be an unbearable loss of control.

But this was just the beginning.

Song Yu, I will make sure you pay for your actions.

Definitely!

After Song Yu left, I didn’t bother to take a bath but quickly dressed and left the bathroom. The large office was deserted, with no sign of Song Yu.

I was ready to leave and ask Chi Jin to take me to see Lu’s body when my hand touched the doorknob. Suddenly, I remembered this was Song Yu’s office, and he was not here…

Slowly, I turned around, my gaze falling on Song Yu’s computer.

He had just argued with me, so he wouldn’t be back anytime soon.

This was a golden opportunity.

I quickly moved to Song Yu’s desk and tried to access his work computer, but it was password-protected. With no other choice, I shut it down and started rummaging through the drawers beneath the desk, hoping to find some useful clues.

Suddenly, I spotted a manila envelope in the bottom drawer. I pulled it out and untied the string, revealing a stack of A4 papers. The top page was labeled “Tianhe Plan.”

Tianhe was Nian Hua’s company.

I flipped through a couple of pages; they weren’t related to the Qingguang New Energy project. I scrutinized the document further, not fully understanding the clauses, but the figure of thirty billion dollars caught my eye.

Could this be the thirty billion project Song Yu had set up to back Nian Hua?

It looked less like corporate investment and more like a bet agreement. Especially with the clause stating: During Huanya’s investment period, if Tianhe Group fails to complete all designated energy projects without any force majeure, they will compensate Huanya ten times the investment amount.

Ten times the investment would be three hundred billion dollars.

Selling off all of Tianhe’s domestic and international assets wouldn’t cover that three hundred billion dollars.

It seems Tianhe was indeed dazzled by Song Yu’s thirty billion dollars, daring to sign such an agreement.

However, from a quick glance, most of the energy projects seemed low-risk. As long as Tianhe maintained its current performance, Song Yu’s money was a sure bet for them.

I slipped the contract back into the manila envelope and returned it to the drawer. Then, I checked Song Yu’s bookshelf and even rummaged through the trash bin by his feet, but found nothing.

It made sense; Song Yu was always cautious and wouldn’t leave anything important in the office.

After putting everything back in order and ensuring nothing seemed out of place, I left the office.

Outside, I dialed Chi Jin’s number. It was close to quitting time, and I asked him to meet me in the underground parking lot. Chi Jin readily agreed.

Once in the car, I immediately asked Chi Jin to take me to see Lu.

Chi Jin sighed softly, a bit hesitant, “Your friend passed away over a month ago. The body has long been cremated, and the ashes have been taken back to his family in Guiyang. If you really want to see him, I can help you contact his parents, but the rest is up to you.”

I truly wanted to see Lu, to say a few words to him, to tell him I missed him, to apologize, to confess. But I didn’t dare face his parents.

Their child died because of me. If it weren’t for me, Lu wouldn’t have met such a tragic fate, leaving this world in such a humiliating manner. How could I face his family?

“No, I can’t face them now. Once I put Song Yu behind bars, I’ll go apologize to his parents.”

Whether they hit or scold me, I’ll accept it. At least I can give myself and Lu’s family some closure.

Although I didn’t go to Guiyang to meet Lu’s parents, I sent them two hundred thousand yuan as Lu’s friend, to cover the expenses of his funeral and to buy a better burial ground for him.

This amount isn’t much for me now; I could give them more. But Lu had once told me about his family situation.

His father was addicted to gambling, and his mother, who had some looks in her youth, did low-end jobs. Now older, she couldn’t earn much, and their life was very tight, relying on Lu to send money monthly to barely make ends meet.

But Lu never sent more than three thousand yuan, just enough for their expenses in a small county town in Guiyang. Sending more would only fuel his father’s gambling habit, which was unnecessary.

Now that Lu is gone, all his savings have gone to his parents, so their current life shouldn’t be too difficult.

As for the future, I will take on the responsibility of supporting his parents, but I won’t give them too much money to avoid unnecessary trouble.

After all, people accustomed to poverty may find it hard to resist greed when they suddenly have money.

I’m a living example; having money made me want more, leading to my current predicament.

Who can I blame?

After the confrontation with Song Yu that day, I expected him to seize the opportunity to make things difficult for me or set traps for me to fall into. However, two days passed without any sign of trouble from him. He was engrossed in summarizing the company’s year-end financial reports and conducting back-to-back video conferences, both domestic and international. The incident from that day seemed to have no impact on him whatsoever.

In Song Yu’s eyes, nothing but profit is worth his time and effort. Anything else is simply not worth his attention or energy. But that’s fine by me. The more he values these things, the more painful it will be for him when he loses them. That’s precisely what I want-the agony of loss.

Three days before the New Year, Huanya had already seen employees heading back to their hometowns, leaving only those who lived relatively close to Hai City still at the office. Chi Jin had booked a flight back to the United States to spend the New Year with his father. I went to the airport to see him off, and before he left, he kept reminding me not to act impulsively and to consult him before making any decisions to avoid arousing Song Yu’s suspicion.

I didn’t want to hear his endless nagging, so I kept assuring him that I understood. After seeing Chi Jin off, I got into a taxi heading back to the company. On the way, I sent Ren Hechuan a message, telling him that I would be heading back to my hometown that afternoon and might be away from Hai City for about ten days.

The implication was that I wouldn’t be able to meet him anytime soon. As I stared at the words “going home for the New Year” on the chat interface, a wave of sadness washed over me. This was my second year away from home.

Last year, I fled my home because of my sexual orientation and didn’t dare return. I could only secretly call my grandfather on New Year’s Eve to send my greetings, then drink myself into oblivion with Lu in our rented apartment. But this year, the person I could secretly wish a happy New Year to was gone, and the one who stayed up drinking with me until dawn was gone too.

Now, it’s just me, all alone. Losing those dearest to you makes even the most luxurious house and the fullest bank account feel empty. This winter has suddenly become so cold, so very cold.

Ren Hechuan quickly called me, and I sniffed as I answered the phone.

“Hello, Mr. Ren,” I greeted with a smile.

“Mr. Bai, are you heading back to your hometown?” Ren Hechuan asked.

“Yes, many colleagues have already gone home. I’m leaving quite late,” I replied, masking my emotions with a light tone.

Ren Hechuan paused for a moment before speaking again, “Would you be able to come to my company now? I have something to discuss with you.”

His words were polite, giving me plenty of face. If I were to refuse, I’d be a fool. Besides, even if I went, Ren Hechuan wouldn’t do anything to me. He carries the burden of leadership and is the reserved type. It’s broad daylight, and the meeting would be at his company. No matter how much he might want to, he wouldn’t act on it.

Technically, Song Yu hadn’t committed to the state-owned enterprise project, so I could completely ignore Ren Hechuan. Yet, I hadn’t severed ties with the electric company for one simple reason: to have a decoy to mislead Song Yu.

Song Yu might not fear Chi Jin, but Ren Hechuan is not someone he can easily afford to offend. Especially after learning about Ren Hechuan’s family background, I became even more convinced of this strategy.

“Sure!” I replied cheerfully.

“Alright, call me when you arrive, and I’ll have my secretary come down to meet you.”

“Okay, Mr. Ren.”

“Let’s leave it at that for now. We’ll talk when we meet,” Ren Hechuan said before hanging up.

I quickly instructed the taxi driver to change the route and head to the electric company.